Dear Ferret Folks-

Today was Science Day. That's what my nephew Alexander told me this
morning. They are giving him high minded ideas in Kindergarten,
apparently. He spent the night and in the morning after pancakes, he
told me that today was an ideal day for using his toy microscope. (It's
one of the toys that stays here for his use. He has a big bucket of
them.) OK. I had time to spare. His Mom wasn't coming to pick him up
until noon. Science Day it would be.

What he means by "Science Day" generally involves the toy microscope.
There are other scientific activities we sometimes pursue, but he
really favors the microscope. He needs adult help with it. I keep it
in a ziplock bag along with some plastic slides and his collection
of things that are interesting to look at with 100X magnification.
Surprisingly, there are a lot of things in the house that work really
well. Bread crumbs. A flake of brown onion paper. Salt. Sugar. Dry moss
from a houseplant. Fresh begonia petals. (Those are my favourite, they
look like thousands of shiny little colored beads.) Paper clips are
good. Fingernail parings are supremely gross. It's always a challenge
to find good things to look at. Most things are too thick and opaque to
transfer light, and just look like the inside of a dark closet at 100X
magnification.

Hmm. What to use, what to use. I was looking around the kitchen where
the microscope was set up on the island, considering, and I saw...Todd.
Todd. Todd covered in glossy dark *fur*. Come here, Todd...little
friend. I won't hurt you...

Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

Man, the *look* he gave me when I gently but firmly loosened a pinch of
fur from his scruff! It looked great at 100X magnification. Dark and
glossy. You could clearly see that there was a difference between the
thickness of the summer fur and the winter fur, just coming in. Very
interesting.

Of course, we are thorough Scientists. Todd's fur was cool, but how
cool would *albino* fur be? Hee-bert...Heee-bert...C'mere little guy...

Hebert gave me a stern look of absolute indignation when I wiggled a
pinch of fur from his scruff. In fact, that may have been the most
intelligent expression that he has ever made in in my presence. I feel
very protective of Hebert because...well...he is a moron. There is no
nice way to say it. He is as thick as two planks. He needs protecting
from himself. We have had to take down the 4-inch drainage tubing that
ran from the cage to ceiling level because Hebert would climb up the
tube, and then couldn't figure out how to get down. He would stay up
there and have panic attacks, panting and overheating because he was up
and he couldn't find any *down*. I am not exaggerating. The poor little
guy spent an overnight up there once, largely because we didn't believe
he wouldn't figure out *down* on his own at some point. Nope. He was
still up there in the morning, miserable, rumpled, and moist. Hebert
freaks if he has to climb down out of a chair by himself. Too high.
It's endearing, in a way. Hebert needs help with daily weasel life, the
same way five year old Alexander needs help with daily hoomin life. But
Alexander is learning a lot faster than Hebert is. And with
considerably more dignity.

If Hebert could talk, I'm pretty sure he would have said " What the
HELL, woman?!"

I didn't get much fur from him. But what I did manage to get looked
really awesome at 100X. Creamy white, gently curved and tapering to
a seemingly invisible tip. Elegant.

Thank you, lads. Your contribution to Science will long be remembered.

Alexandra in MA

[Posted in FML 6143]