Dearest Ranger,
 
I am sorry, I haven't written lately, but Mom has put Nikki & me, in
charge of watching over our Brother Spanky.  Even though he's weak, he
keeps us busy.  He is so happy we're Engaged.
 
What do you think will happen with the warring Clans, the Drunken Oracle
and the Awaken Sukie Creature?  Spanky, says not to worry, with enough
Ferretone, all will be well, soon.  Is that true?  Enough Ferretone,
will fix anything?  I hope so, we haven't heard from our cousin's, the
O'Hara's, in such a long time.  I sure hope their raisin stash is safe.
You haven't heard anything bad, have you?
 
Oh Ranger, Mom made some of that "World Famous, Doodlebug's Chicken
Pate".  Oh Ranger, it's WONDERFUL!  I'm not sick, but when she brings
it in for Spanky, everyone, (except for Nikki), is jumping all over the
plate, we be helping him out by gobbling up our fair share.  It's almost
as good as Ferretone & Ferretvite in one.  Doodlebug is not only a Movie
Star; he's a great Chef too.  He's a sweet guy and his heart totally
belongs to Dippy.  It's so sad her Daddy is such a MAJOR POOP HEAD, where
Doodlebug is concern.  I sure hope he changes his mind, about him; I want
my friend Dippy to be as happy as I am now, since I have you.
 
I have a small package, for you.  I have asked Mom to send it to you
tomorrow.  I Pick out lots of stuff I liked, just for you.  I hope you
like them too.
 
Well, Ranger, Dearest, got to run, Mom's bringing the "Doodlebug's
Chicken Pate" for Spanky dinner.  Boy does he have it made, even his
medicine is Chicken flavored.
 
Yours,
Ruby Jean O'Ferret
[Posted in FML issue 4136]