Dooks to all, condolences to those who've lost their beloved little fur
kids.
 
Georgia-do you honestly mean you didn't get him a military uniform????
C'mon, girl, think of how he'd looked in that NRA meeting dressed in a
Marine combat uniform.  The women would have been going nuts for him
(hey, my daughter says there's nothing like a man in a Marine uniform!)
Get some camoflage paint for his face, strap a round of ammo around his
shoulders-he'd be a good Recon soldier (as long as they don't have raisins
around).  And if you notice things being knocked down, you'll know he's
having target practice.  Watch out, you might find Jackalope heads, mice
tails, maybe raisins, all on little wall mounts setting down low.  I can
see Kouri, swaggers in with gun in a shoulder holster, the other ferrets in
awe, he'll have his own little chair with side table, picture of Charleton
Heston (autographed no less) and his award beside it.  He can regale the
others with his NRA meeting/Award, tell them of his hunting prowess.  Just
watch out for the Marine, Navy, or Army recruiters showing up!  Does he
have the bumper sticker yet about 'you can have my gun when you can pry it
out of my paws - or you can bribe me for raisins' (Sorry, little editorial
license there)  Just make sure you don't find him in front of a mirror
learning how to 'twirl' it on his paw, doing a John Wayne swagger and
looking at the other ferrets going "well, pilgrim, lemme tell ya....."
 
You can tell your a ferret owner when:
 
You don't allow anyone to throw out their old t-shirts because they make
good ferret bedding.
 
Your ferret can claw your hand when you bathe them, you wouldn't even
attempt to bathe the cat because you know they'd claw you (worse, yes,
but still.....)
 
You never baby talked your children, but you find yourself making baby
talk to the ferrets
 
You don't allow humans to eat or drink after you, but you share your food
with your ferrets, and allow them to stick their tongue into your milk and
ice tea (and if unseen some will try cappuccino-think they're normally
wired, HAHAHAHAHA!!!)
 
You trade vehicles and the most important thing is that there's enough room
to put the ferret cages in it for long trips so they'll be comfortable
(the human passengers can be miserable, but the fuzzies & cats have to be
comfortable)
 
Joseph: Your parents should be so proud of you!  You are an incredible
ferret owner-it's great to see.  Smokey certainly picked the right human
to own.
 
Lisa: you might try Craisins.  Also, I discovered a little over a year
ago some of my kids are enamored of animal crackers (no, they didn't dig
through to see if they could find ferret crackers).  I made the mistake
of going upstairs and playing with them while having the bag with me.
Needless to say, I had ferrets get into the bag and steal my cookies!
 
Rebecca & the Crew of Merry Mayhem
"Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy, and
 taste good with ketchup"
[Posted in FML issue 3264]