Dear Ferret Folks-
 
While excavaring my living room today I discovered a previously undetected
ferret stash between the arm of the living room sofa and the wall.  It is
a very small area, but what a remarkable and varied array of items was
revealed by a five minute archaeological inventory of the hoard!  Switch
and Sabrina have been busy.
 
1)Two pens.  One ballpoint, one felt tip.  Now I know why there are no
pens next to the phone in there, anymore.
 
2)A flyer for 'New England Tech.' Come take night classes.  An issue of
'Outdoor Life' magazine that I most assuredly never got to see.  So which
of the ladies wants night classes, and which wants to go camping?
 
3)A business card from Sandy Boudreau, Human Resources Manager for
Hudson-RPM Distributors, LLC.  My husband works for them, but why do
ferrets collect business cards?  From a HUMAN resource specailist, of all
things?  Maybe I should give her a call.  "Hi.  You don't know me, but my
ferret has your business card."
 
4)The fuzzy felt pad from the underside of a chair leg, designed to keep
the legs from scraping the floor.  Now I have to check all of my kitchen
chairs.  However did they wrestle THAT from beneath a chair sitting on
the floor?  I never leave my chairs any way but sitting on all four legs.
For what concievable purpose was this item selected?
 
5)Five 'Popcorn-Flavor' rice cakes.  Well, they do like styrofoam and
starch packing peanuts, these are more or less diet starch peanut patties
for people.  I note that they are conspicuously uneaten.
 
6)A bag of 'Whoppers' malted milk balls, emptied of it's contents.  They
do beat the heck out of rice cakes.
 
7)An empty carton of Ben & Jerry's and TWO spoons.  Hmmm.  Two ferrets,
two spoons....
 
8)Eleven cents.  Saving up for more Ben & Jerry's?
 
9)A spark plug wire.  Where the *hell* did that come from?
 
The other day I read an article about a previously unsiscovered hoard of
ancient coins in Britian.  A social scientist was trying to say that the
coins told us various things about the people that collected and buried
them.  Or DID they?  Hmmmm....I bet they were shiny, once...Perhaps they
were stashed by late medieval ferrets!  How much of the archaeological
record needs to be re-written?
 
Alexandra in Massachusetts
 
Switch the Kit: "Heh! They'll never find Jimmy Hoffa!"
Sabrina the Bat-Biter: "Or his socks!"
[Posted in FML issue 3770]