I was interrupted in my programming yesterday by the chittering of one
*angry* ferret.  These were not the high-pitched squeals of pain, just
the sounds of something that was *extremely* p.o.'d.
 
I figured that I had better get up and break up the battle before someone
got hurt.  I walked down the hall, passing Dodge, who was *not* the source
of the problem: he was curled up in the laundry basket pretending to be a
large jelly doughnut.  Mad the cat appeared, curious, but not involved.
Curtis, who was making all the noise, was en route to the bathroom,
*CHITTERING* still, and Sid the cat was slinking away sheepishly.
 
I first assumed that Sid had done something nasty to Curt.  Sid, however,
looked fairly placid and mildly confused.  (i.e.  not puffed up like a
tribble, which would indicate involvement.) Curtis was warping around, up
the cat tree, down the ferret slide, racing down the hall, charging in and
out of tubes, boxes, and alleyways behind the furniture, all the while
barking "CH-CH-CH-CH-CH" with rage.  He seemed convinced that and Invisible
Ferret was chasing him.
 
I had been cleaning the oven an hour ago, and suddenly worried that he had
*somehow* got a chemical burn from some oven cleaner that I had perhaps
spilled and missed.  I caught the raging rat and dunked him in a sink of
water.  After a general scrub, the chittering stopped, and Curt went off to
hide in a box and lick himself dry.
 
I did a search of the nearest rooms for some hint as to what happened.
Radiators, stove, oven: all cold.  No chemicals or rags to get into.  No
broken glass....nothing.  And then I found, (manually, i.e.  with my bare
feet), in the middle of my livingroom, a pile of ferret doodoo.  Obviously
*this* load really wanted to get out.  Closer inspection revealed that it
was composed of vegetable matter: specifically, peppers.  Final analysis:
Curtis had eaten two scotch bonnets that had passed their prime and made it
into the compost, a location recently scouted by the little monster.
 
After his accidental dump, I concluded, he got the impression that the
Evil Invisible Ferret was biting him on the butt and wouldn't let go.
 
Moral of the story:  What goes in must come out.  Keep it in mind.
 
Lynn.
[Posted in FML issue 1547]
[Posted in FML issue 1547]