Endowment for Rehabilitation, Research, Education & Training Society, NW
 
  F           E           R           R            E         T          S  ,
Northwest
 
                        Lipinski's LUMPSCHEWS
 
 
Introduction.  LUMPSCHEWS was developed at F.E.R.R.E.T.S., NW to provide
ferrets a home-made alternative to the commercial product known as
"Cheweasels" or abbreviated, "CW."
 
1.) Unlike the CW there is no cautionary note requiring you to keep the
LUMPSCHEWS away from heat sources.  These "CHEWS" cannot melt nor become
sticky, but to the contrary, become softer and more tasty the longer they
remain in the LUMPS.
 
2.) No need to keep the ferret from putting the ""CHEWS" into the water
dish, the nest box, or even into the litter pan.  Let him do what he wants.
 
3.) For longer term storage the "CHEWS' may be stored in old cottage cheese
containers or equivalent and placed in the freezer.  Warm a little after
removing from freezer to take off the chill and provide the aroma that will
entice your ferret.
 
4.) CHEWS are fully digestible and contrary to the claim of CHEWEASEL that
their toy is the only chew toy designed specifically for the ferret, please
be informed that CHEWS are also designed for the ferret.
 
5.) CHEWS chunks that are chewed off by the ferret are fully digestible,
just as the skin of any animal would be were it eaten by the ferret.  CHEWS
are not artificially colored, nor flavored.  Hence, the risks of carcogenic
chemicals are eliminated.
 
6.) CHEWS absorbs the basic constituents of LUMPS, since they are cooked in
the soup and take on whatever flavor and odor that a particular batch of
LUMPS has.
 
7.) The response of the "average" ferret to "CHEWS" is immediate,
especially when the ferret has been previously fed on LUMPS.  When offering
for the first time the ferret should be hungry.  If possible retain an end
grip on the springy CHEWS strip and play the game of "Tug of War" with your
ferret as it tugs its end of the CHEWS.  Of course it is important that
your ferret wins this "Tug of War" game.
 
8.) Unlike the advice given for the CW wherein it is suspended from a high
place for the ferret to chase and pull on, it is suggested that this not be
done with the CHEWS.  Nor for that matter no edible "toy" of any kind,
because encouraging a ferret to eat its toy is never a good idea.  Consider
instead getting the FERRET GOOD-TIME CHASE BALL from us or, if you are so
inclined, writing for the illustrated directions and make one of these
chase ball rubber toys yourself.
 
9.) Some ferrets may not initially show other than fleeting interest in the
CHEWS.  This is particularly true of the mature and older ferrets that may
have been so restricted on their lifelong food that they are fixated on
just that one kind of food and that food only.  Not very good for the
ferret.  As stated above, the LUMPS fed ferrets will go for this CHEWS in a
big way.  Others may not, at first anyway.  Following are some simple ideas
that may help you to encourage your ferret to go for the CHEWS.
 
A.  If your ferret likes Ferretone, soak the CHEWS in that oil mixture for
a day or two.  Remove it and allow to drain for several hours before trying
it on your ferret again.  You could also try to smear it with a light
coating of that hi-potency energy/vitamin paste that comes in a squeeze
tube or even try some peanut butter, fish oil, or just plain butter.
Sometimes try a presoak in frapped cantelope, honeydew mellon or even
watermellon slurry to which a teaspoon full of ordinary yoghurt is added.
 
B.  For the ferret that never has had the benefit of LUMPS, but is a sole
source of food feeder, you might try blending a portion of his one and only
food in a blender with a little bit of yoghurt, fat-free milk, over-ripe
banana and a tiny piece of orange.  Offer this for his acceptance in place
of his regular chunky food and as he shows interest and eats it, then soak
the CHEWS in it for several hours before offering it to him.  Also reduce
his normal ration of chunky food to about 1/3 during the effort to change
him over to accepting a slightly different food.
 
C.  For ferrets that are big kissers on your lips and that seem to like the
taste and texture of your saliva, there is also this approach.  Put the
CHEWS is a small dish or cup and just spit in it five or six times.  Add a
little bit of warm water and let soak for one half hour.  Remove, drain,
but do not wash off, and then offer to your ferret.  Chances are the ferret
will go for this big time.  Of course if you are a tobacco chewer and just
love your "Red Man," then wait a few hours after you rinse.
 
2.  Making Lipinski's Home-made LUMPSCHEWS.  Following is a description of
the items used in preparing CHEWS at home.  Please note that this
description and the procedure that follows requires the concurrent making
of LUMPS itself.  However, this procedure may be shortcutted by using a
liquid soak at elevated temperatures of any other substance that you may
choose to flavor the CHEWS.  The substance you may use would be a liquid
phase of a particular food that your ferret favors, especially if the
ferret has never had the pleasure of lapping up LUMPS.
 
1.)   Rawhide Retriever Roll,   CadetAmerican.  Size 10-1/2 inches by
1-1/2 inches.  12 per package at Costco Store.  U.S. Beef Rawhide
processed in Brazil S.A. and distributed by IMS Trading Corp., North
Bergen, NJ.  Item No. 27036.  UPC code 7  68303 05182  1.   These natural
beef rawhide retriever rolls are a great chewing exercise to help keep
your dog's teeth and gums healthy and his breath fresh.  Give your dog
hours of chewing satisfaction with the rawhide taste he loves.  See
Figure 3.
 
2.)   Narrow, round and high tin can measuring about 8-1/2 inches by
2-5/8 inches for soaking the rawhide retriever rolls.  The tin can used
at Ferrets NorthWest FNW originally contained six German sausages called
"Frankfurters" from Frankfurt, Deutschland (G) Germany.  However any
large casserole dish or elongate container would suffice.  The tall
German sausage can just takes up less room on the kitchen counter than
does such a large casserole dish.  See Figure 4.
 
3.)  Add 1/2 teaspoon IODIZED salt to German sausage can (or pan) and
fill to 1/2 full with water.  Insert rawhide retriever roll.  Add more
water to fill sausage can completely.  Set aside for 4 to 6 hours and
allow to soak in IODIZED salted water.  Withdraw retriever roll and
insert into sausage can reverse of original position.  Add more water to
fill and set aside for 4 to 6 hours.
 
                        End of Part 2   LUMPSCHEWS
 
Part 3 containing paragraphs 4.) through 11.) and Figures 5 and 6 and
summary are not included here.
 
No illustrations are provided in this posting.  However Edward Lipinski
has provided his own hand-drawn, inked illustrations for the six Figures
referenced in the text.  The entire 6 or 7-page pamphlet, including
illustrations, is available from the Ferret Endowment at
[log in to unmask]  Any and all benefits accruing to the Ferret Endowment
from this pamphlet will go to support Edward Lipinski's life of debauchment
of wine, women, and song and anything left over will buy chocolates,
half/half milk, and ice cream for the ferrets.
[Posted in FML issue 2723]