Q: "I sometimes wonder if my ferrets like me.  [They] seem to rather play
    with each other than me.  Do you really think ferrets like people?"
 
A:  Only those who don't mind checking the occasional bacula.
 
I have no doubt that ferrets have emotions.  However, I must stress those
emotions are not human, but ferret emotions.  The term for assigning human
emotions to non-human animals is "anthropocentricism," or "human centered."
While most behavioral scientists seem to be in agreement that animal
emotions (human included) fall along a wide continuum, at the present
levels of knowledge there is no concrete evidence that suggests those
emotions are the same as ours.  I certainly think the basic emotions are
similar, such as joy-fear, or anger-fright.  Maybe even curiosity.  But
the other ones are difficult to qualify, much less quantify.  Love is a
can of worms I don't even wish to discuss; I don't even understand it in
humans.  If you think your ferret loves you, then, as far as I am
concerned, it does.
 
Most of the problem is not the recognition of fear or joy in other animals,
but in the interpretation of various middle-ground emotions.  I've heard
people say that a ferret was "getting back at them," or "holding a grudge."
Personally, I don't think the ferret would be so mean (not being human)
as to resort to primitive higher primate back-stabbing or name-calling
rituals.  The ferret expresses what it feels.  If you get a lick, it's a
positive feeling.  If you get a bite, then a negative feeling.  I'm still
deciding about the "lick-lick-chomp."
 
Q: "I've been one of those silent readers for a number of years.  I don't
    post because I am pretty sensitive about things and couldn't stand
    getting flamed.  I've read some bad stuff printed about you.  How do
    you get past it?"
 
A:  I wear asbestos undies and use no. 50 fire block.
 
The truth is, I was a photojournalist for 12 years.  Not much can be said
on the internet that can reach the levels of verbal (and physical) violence
which was done to me back then.  I am also helped because I am a graduate
student now, and if you think you've seen bad flames on the FML, then baby
come to my next committee meeting.  I will admit that when I first started
posting, a few people got to me, but I was lucky enough to either not
respond, or be gently reminded by Bill that I was a gentleman.  I have
caught on since then, and the worst sent my way hasn't even raised a
graying eyebrow.
 
Let's face it; if you stand outside, it will occasionally rain on you.
Somewhere, someone will not like you much and decide it is their goal in
life to make you the target of hate and nastiness.  You will be smeared
offline, false stories will be told about you, even circumstances invented
to further those hateful and nasty goals.  Now, you can fight each and
every rumor, which takes a hell of a lot of energy, or you can ignore them
and hope your reputation speaks for itself.  I choose the later because you
will never convince those who want to believe hateful and untrue stories or
that you are innocent.  All you do is become as unclean as those flinging
the mud.  Besides, a man much wiser than me said, "You can tell the tree
by it's fruit." Those who use any excuse to blast other people or spread
rumors are displaying a "fruit" that is clearly recognized by others.  So
to mix metaphors (so sue me), even if the words are hurtful, most of the
FML recognize the loudest squeals come from the biggest sows.
 
But it does concern me that the FML is getting the reputation that people
will be flamed for stating their opinions.  I feel that is horribly wrong,
and not because it happens to me.  I do think it is pathetic that some
people have to build their own self-worth on the attempt to destroy the
reputations of others, but that is their problem, not mine.  What bothers
me is that people who honestly need help become afraid of posting and the
ferrets are the only ones harmed.  All I can say is you should always post
your opinions, and if those occasional people should blast you, just delete
the mail without reading it.  If it helps, just consider it poisoned fruit
from a sick and diseased tree.  Delete and forget it.
 
Q: "Are there any published ferret bibliographys?"
 
A:  Depends. Have any money? I accept checks.
 
Yes, there are several.  However, they are either out of date, incomplete,
or both.  There is no modern, up-to-date, complete bibliography.  Sorry.
BUT, it isn't so bleak.  You can join me and nearly 50 other people who
are working on such a bibliography as I speak.  Well, more like as soon as
I start the show (real soon).  You can join the effort, as well as gain
access to a central depository of articles by joining my little group.
Just email me with "FELLOW FERRET GEEK" in the subject line and I'll be
happy to send you some information.  The only requirement to join is the
willingness to contribute in some small way; either by title translation,
or typing and catagorizing, or by photocopying stuff.  Some people will be
building a web page, others will be simply donating their newsletter.  It
is a reference cooperative, nothing more.  And *YOU* are invited!  You can
scan past issues of the FML for more explicit details or write directly.
 
Bob C and 18 Mo' Poofy Poopheads
[Posted in FML issue 2797]