Just to let some of you know Tori went through her de-nadding quite well
(You know, the gonads).  Now that she's shaved, her's is the first belly
I've seen that's more fluorescent than my own (I define the "white" in
crayola colors).  I've begun calling her "blue-belly."
 
I've mentioned privately that I use a chest sling for the sickies so they
can be comforted by a warm body and "natural sounds" (No "Bean and Brocoli
Soup" jokes, please).  Tori is sleeping in one at present (She's a ferret
close to my heart).  They are simple; I just take a handtowel, fold it
roughly into thirds (long ways), and sew the edges to form a pocket with a
flap.  Tuck the flap into the pocket to form a pocket without a flap.  On
the side with a single thickness of towel, sew your choice of cord at each
corner (the bottom corners tie around your back, the top corners tie around
your neck) If I tie it right, the little sickie beastie sleeps across my
chest--you may want to adjust the position depending on the size of personal
anatomical markers of the feminine type, or if you are some type of behemoth
muscleperson.  The single layer goes against your skin so warmth can seep
in, and the double layer goes against the night air as insulation.  One of
my older slings has a hole in it, and the fuzzies sometimes stick thier
heads out, so I look like a long-haired guy wearing a bizarre bra with some
type of strange growth peeking through.  Ferrets.  You gotta love them!
 
My beasties love this--all 13--and will sleep for hours in the contraption.
Anyone who wants to steal this idea and makes tons of money sewing and
selling has my permission, because I stole it from a vet in Africa who used
it with sick primates (No, I don't have a monkey on my back...its on my
front!).  Apparently it was a modification of a sling the locals used to
carry lambs and calves.
 
All you who wanted me to visit this month are urged to send (via private
e-mail) phone numbers and/or directions.  I leave Saturday.  Yes, I will be
back, nah nah nah!
 
My third topic is language; not ferret speak, but FML speak.  I've almost
caught up on the FML, and have been reading all the stuff about rabies.
Well, I know more about rabies than the average dead person, so I guess that
amounts to diddly-squat.  I hate to side in an argument I really know
nothing about, but since my Ahab does it, what not me?  I have to say that
IMHO Jeff is right in his assertion that people listen better when you speak
the proper language.
 
When I teach lab sciences, I stress that not only are you learning
biological systems, but you are also learning the language of describing
biological components in such a manner that anyone, anywhere, anytime, can
understand what you are saying.  Speaking incorrect science lingo is like
having a deep southern Texas accent; you are positioned on an intelligence
ladder--the worse it is, the denser you are (OK, I'm sorry if I offended any
real Texans; I'm just picking on them because of Margaret and Barbkitty.
Besides, if they were truly dense, the bubbas wouldn't float...) The point
is, if you want to impress me in subjects like evolution, osteology,
paleoecology, nutritive physiology, mammalogy, or just plain science, you
need to not only speak the lingo, but use it correctly as well.  This is
even truer if you want to say I'm wrong, because I think "If this bozo
doesn't even know the terminology, can't frame a debate, and all they took
was an intro class on the subject, or worse, just read something by Stephen
Jay Gould, how do they know I'm wrong in the first place?"
 
Complicating matters is the defensive nature of the upper bozos.  This might
be seen as an unfair generalization, even stereotypic, but I've found many
of the people who do science at the local or state levels are not exactly
rocket scientists in that they've never learned the difference between
debating a point and attacking the person.  They are very defensive, and
even more unsure of themselves, so polite suggestions are seen as horrid
attacks.
 
But speak their lingo and offer reliable evidence or data, and they
eventually turn around.  They have no choice if they want to keep the
respect of their peers, which in science (as anything I suppose) is
critical.  You've heard of publish or perish?  That used to apply only to
professors; now the heavy pressure is on grad students to publish as well.
But no matter how good your stuff is, do one really stupid thing and you've
become the short bespeckled nerd wanting to play baseball but just passing
out the jock straps (Just ask Carleton Coon or the guys who worked on cold
fusion).  You need to maintain a good standing among your peers if you ever
want to get hired or _any_ respect.  (Science gossip is worse than anything
you've ever heard from old grannies.  I have actually heard "The dolt
dropped a decimal and was off by a factor of ten."..."Really?  What a
maroon.  He calls himself a scientist?" I heard it from my committee.)
 
The bottom line is, there are two ways to change the minds of the bozos in
charge; through revolution or through evolution.  Both work, but revolution
randomly "kills" politicans (ok unemploys, but "kills" sounds so good),
while evolution just "kills" those who are to dumb to learn.  Get the data,
offer it respectfully in a public forum, allow them to think of how smart
they will look if they accept it, then "kill" the dimwits who don't listen.
 
Bob and the 12 Sharp and 1 Foggy-brained Ferts
[Posted in FML issue 1555]