Soooo....it appears I scratched some raw nerves with my categorizing ferrets
into two basic groups: Sissy ferrets and Real ferrets.
 
Would you prefer: Inferior Ferrets and Superior Ferrets.  No, not that
either?  Well, then please tell me, first, do you agree that there are at
least two broad categories of ferrets, based on their health and longevity?
Surely, such delineation can't get your emotions in an uproar .  .  .  can
it?  Second, then if you do agree, perhaps haltingly, what names would you
ascribe to the two categories?
 
Until I read of a better nomenclature, I'll use Inferior Ferrets and
Superior Ferrets.
 
Now, (Since BIG agrees that facts will be tolerated in contrast to
"opinions.")
 
                                the facts.
In the media, garnered from this very Ferret Digest, accept the following:
 
Greater than 140,000 ferrets are sold by retail pet stores in the USA
annually, as cited by Alicia Drakiotes.
                                    and . . .
Pamela Troutman Grant, [log in to unmask], reports these interesting numbers:
Annually into their shelter . . . . . . . . . . . 150 ferrets
Percentage Marshall Farms . . . . . . . . . . . .  60
Percentage Adrenal disease (cancer) non-MF . . . . 10
Percentage Adrenal disease (cancer) Marshalls. . . 90
 
Since nobody has evidence to the contrary it is a mathematical certainty
that the total number of pet store (read Marshall Farms) ferrets in the USA
to have cancer is more than 126,000 (90 percent of >140,000 ferrets).
 
Note that of the non-Marshall Farms ferrets, there is an incidence of 10
percent cancer.  Well now, how can this be?  Is there a teeney-weeney bit of
a difference between the MF ferrets and the other kind - whatever they are?
 
This report is not designed as an attack on Marshall Farms.  It is an attack
on ignorance.  Mine, as well as yours.
 
Several months ago, Edward Lipinski cited the figure of 70 percent of MFs
will develop cancer within the first four years of life.  Golly, Edju
(Polish diminutive for Edward) looks like you were wrong!  The actual figure
is closer to 90 percent rather than 70 percent.  Damn! I goofed again.
 
Locally, a very sincere and dedicated young woman at the University of
Washington has started a compilation of reported adrenal disease in ferrets.
Her name is Lynn McIntosh, [log in to unmask], and she has reported, as
of Nov 27, '97, her list #58.
 
Tell me dear friends: How could the difference between Inferior Ferrets and
Superior Ferrets by more truthfully, more vividly shown to you?
 
                Candide et caute. [L.] With candor and caution.
 
Edward Frettchenvergnuegen Lipinski,  Der Frettchenlustbarkeitsfuehrer !
Frettchenvergnuegen [G.] Joy of Ferrets.  F...fuehrer [G.] Ferret frolics
leader.
 
[Moderator's note: Contrary to Ed's statement, opinions certainly ARE
welcome on the FML.  Just not when they are phrased as "flames".  BIG]
[Posted in FML issue 2141]