You know you're a ferret owner when--
 
You're in a pet store and you try out all the squeaky toys to pick one
closest to the one your ferts respond to best.  You find an exact duplicate
and think "Great, I'll have an extra when they stash the original." Then a
dog and owner come down the aisle, and the dog REALLY likes that toy.  You
nobly let the owner have it (you're a dog person, too).  Six months later,
you're still kicking yourself for being noble, especially as the old one is
losing its squeak.
 
You get hot under the collar when you see soft foam cat balls being sold as
ferret toys, or ferret beds made of covered foam with the foam exposed on
the bottom.
 
You go into a favorite pet store to buy a ferret toy for your fuzzbutts, and
realize that they already have at least one of every toy there--except for
the $200.00 cat treehouse, and you're tempted....
 
You get strange looks at pet stores, because you stand there tugging and
yanking on the cat toys to see how quickly your ferrets can destroy them.
 
You get mad at your Yorkie for misbehaving, and you scruff her.... She looks
up at you with a "Huh?" expression on her face.  Scruffing is NOT dog
language for "Bad girl!"
 
You drive 45 minutes each way to get the best ferret food you can for them,
and haunt the local pet stores for the one treat that all of them love.
When you find it, you buy four cans at a time so you don't run out.
 
You unabashedly cry at your computer terminal when you read on the FML about
a ferret dying.  Unfortunately, the only computer that you have Internet
access on is at work!  From time to time, your co-workers suspect that you
have serious personal problems.  June 12, 1997 was one of those times.
 
You have the ferret-cam book marked on your search engine, so you can get a
ferret fix from time to time during your work day.
 
You know you're becoming like your ferret when:
 
You scruff your daughter when she misbehaves.
 
You excuse yourself to go to the bathroom with the phrase "Excuse me, I
gotta find a corner."
 
Melody Tomaszewicz
 
Melodyt and the four fuzzbutts
Furry--"I'm the first, and I'm SOOOO dignified."
Sweetie--The ferret doughnut, "Com'on Mom, let me sleep some more. YAWN."
Friskie--"Get those air goblins!  Get 'um, get 'um, get um!
          Oops, I fell over."
Angel--"Gotta play, Gotta play! KILL, KILL, KILL, KILL!
        OOPS...sorry. PLAY, PLAY, PLAY!"---Now in foster care. (Sob)
[Posted in FML issue 2217]