Ok. That's ENOUGH PEOPLE!!!!! I've had it. I will settle this debate
once and for all, and THEN - you all must LET THE CHICKENS LIVE!!! FREE
THE CHICKENS!! FREE ALL THE KIBBLE!!! FREEDOM OF THE KIBBLE EATING
CHICKENS!!! FREEDOM TO ALL THE CHICKEN EATING KIBBLE!!!!
You know what this arguement did to me? Huh? You wanna know? 'Don't
try playing hidey hole with me!!! You know who you are, don'tcha? Those
who have chosen to continue to bat the food issue back and forth like a
batmitton birdie. I've now been completely driven NUTS!!! You wanna
know still? I went home. Took each one of my fuzzlies out and smooched
em. Then I asked them if I could eat dinner with them. That's right
you beezle heads.
I sat and munched down some of their chow, that made of corn, that made
of cow. I started with their Marshall's, chicken - I figured that'd
taste good - imagine though, my suprise when it tasted just like wood!!!
It stuck to my mouth like an ole dry shoe - feed them that again - No Way
EEEWWWW!. I tasted their Totally Ferret, as it seemed to smell the best,
how was I supposed to know - it'd taste just like rest? I tried it wet,
I tried it dry, I tried it on my head - after all was said and done - my
stomach just went dead!! I moved right on to Bandit Treats, yes that's
just what I did. How was I supposed to know - they tasted just like
squid? I tried to eat them ala' carte' - I tried them in a stew. I
tried them standing on my head, and with Dr. Suess too!!!! I tasted
their little kitten chow, which makes them grow much bigger - I tried it
with ice cream and milk, and added little jiggers!!! I tasted their
Advantage Ferrets, it made me feel real gassy, by the time I'd tried them
all again, my eyes were just so glassy!!!! I drank their ferretone down,
like it was whiskey shots, I figured my body could use it now, to wash
out all the clots!!! I brushed my teeth with Ferrevite - I figured for
dessert, how was I supposed to know - that this was just for ferts? I
tried their little "fruity snacks" - with no real fruit within - and
when I had enough, of that, well, I tried them all again!!!! When I was
through - and their food was gone - my fuzzies looked at me. Mom they
said - whats up with you - you like your gonna pee!!! We then moved on
to the 'living course' - the source of all this strife, oh how was I
supposed to know, first you kill it with a knife? After the chicken got
away - we tried to be real crafty - we had to catch that varmint quick -
before the day turned drafty!!! We ran and chased and chased and ran -
til we could run no more, then 4 sets of pleading eyes, said: Mom lets
just go to the store!!!. To the store they drove my car, as I could not
see straight - then ran 3 reds, and yellows too - to end this great
debate!!! When we got home, we sat and dined on fine raw chicken parts,
we ate the wings, the leggies too - and then we ate their hearts! After
cleaning all the plates - we sat and heaved a sigh. The kids just sat
and looked at me - and said, "Why oh Mommy, why? I told them I had such
a time, trying to feed them well - and when they heard of this great
debate - they said: Tell them all to go to h***!!!! We like the food
you give us now - we like it mighty fine - and since you went that far
for us - with you forever we'll dine!!!!
Take that you food debaters!!!
Kim and Her Army of Idiots
Lord, help me to be grateful for what I have, and not greedy for what I
want.....fd
[Posted in FML issue 5212]
|
