Dear Ferret Folks-
 
There is no such thing as a free lunch.  Nope, not even for weasels.  At
least not in my house.  Every now and then the ladies have to earn their
keep.  How?  By amusing the occasional group of children who come over to
visit.  Invariably, the ferrets are the main attraction for them.
 
Amusing our little guests.Over the years Sabrina the Bat-Biter has endured
many of these sessions.  Switch the Kit is a newbie.  She had nooooo idea
what was coming, although Sabrina might have whispered in her ear that she
ought to brace herself.
 
There are several games that the children really enjoy playing with the
ladies.  Dress up is a given.  Imagine ferrets peeping out of the open
tops of knee socks.  Ferrets wearing doll clothes.  Ferrets fantasizing
that in reality, they were fierce child-eating polecats.  Ferrets wearing
gauzy ladies head-scarves around their middles like ballet tu-tu's,
wishing that children were rabbits.  Ferrets can evidently be used AS
clothes, as well.  I have seen both girls and boys wear them draped
around their necks as living, sulking, mink stoles.
 
Hide and go seek is always a winner, although I'm not always sure that the
children understand that those ferrets are REALLY hiding, I mean really
really hiding because it's a b**** to get the sticky from Hawiian Punch
out of your tail fur.
 
I am happy to report that I have only had one very bad thing happen during
a play session.  Little Cousin Danny, then four, decided that "ferrets
smell', so he took an aerosol can of industrial strength boot deodorizer
and sprayed "Don't".  He meant well, he thought he was helping her.  He
cried bitterly when we made him understand that animals clean themselves
with their tongues, and the spray could make Don't sick.  (We laundered
her, she was fine.) He's ten now, and still feels badly.
 
It's probably good that the ladies can't type, because I'm sure that they
have their own things to say about how much they enjoy these little play
sessions, and this is a family-friendly forum.
 
Sincerely,
Alexandra in Massachusetts
 
Switch the Kit:" Aunt Sabrina, how do you spell '&%$#@' ?"
Sabrina the Bat-Biter: "Look,kid, I know how you feel but it pays the
rent."
[Posted in FML issue 3683]