LISA!  A spiral fracture for *turning around*?  We need to write you a
better story, something more exotic.
 
How about you were attacked in the elevator by the enraged wife of your
lover, the European tennis pro?  Named, ah...Paolo.  Yeah.  Paolo.  And
he was blonde, and 24.  And she was really mad about the big canary
yellow diamond pendant he gave you, the one formerly owned by Napoleon
Bonaparte's first wife.
 
That's much better.
 
Alexandra in MA
[Posted in FML issue 4867]