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From:
sargentcolburn <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Tue, 7 May 2002 21:21:23 -0400
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Dear Ferret Folks-
 
Switch the Kit has the worst case of A.D.F.S. that I have ever seen.
A.D.F.S., or, Apparently Dead Ferret Syndrome, a baffling condition that
appears to have no evolutionary advantage that I can determine.  What
possible benefit can be derived from sleeping so soundly that ANYTHING
can catch and eat you?  Even me.  A three-toed sloth could kick the ass
of an A.D.F.S. victim.
 
How can it be to their advantage to sleep so deeply that you can toss them
in the air like pizza dough, and they just land in your two hands as a
dead weight, head upsidedown and lolling bonelessly, tongue, hanging out
between open fangs?  Partially opened eyes glazed over?  I threw Switch
this way six or seven times tonight without waking her while we stood in
a circle around her and laughed until our collective asses loosened and
were in imminent danger of falling off.
 
My husband imagines a scene from ancient history.  A hunter, all dressed
in furs, reaches into a burrow up to his arm, and comes out with an
apparently dead ferret.  A nice fresh one, still warm.  "I'll eat this
later!"  He says, and throws it into his bag.  Hours later, it comes to
life in his bag and wants to play.  The hunter's bellows of fear must
have echoed through the forest for miles...
 
Alexandra in Massachusetts,
Playing ferret-toss
 
Switch the Kit: "Huuuuunh? Whaa?"
Sabrina the Bat-Biter: "I said ARE YOU DEAD?"
Switch the Kit: "Sorry, I didn't hear you, I was dead."
[Posted in FML issue 3776]

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