Why do they do what they do, huh?  Well, if you can find the location where
they stashed their "Requirements Of Being A Ferret" manual, or the "Ferret
Logistics and Organization" tables, you might get a hint of why they act
the way they do.  If you don't find either of these items stashed somewhere
in your home, and if you can't learn "Ferret-eze", then I'm afraid that you
are out of luck on the explanation end.
 
Ferrets do what they do because it's their in their job descriptions.
Each ferret, when each ferret is born, it goes through a sort of
"indoctrination", outlining it's job for the remainder of it's time on
Earth.  Occasionally, they will deviate for a short period of time to
satisfy a singular curiosity, but it will always return to it's predestined
course.
 
Now that we've gotten the technical stuff out of the way, here's what I
think about your ferret that won't kiss you, but will kill that 10-year-old
boy: The boy tastes different.  The boy might have been playing in
something that the ferret agreed with sometime prior to visiting.  The boy
may have taken a bath with some sort of soap that the ferret found tasty
(yes, ferrets eat soap...some seem to actually *like* the stuff!) or at
least worthy of licking.
 
It *could* also be that *you* use something that your fuzzie *doesn't*
agree with.  Maybe putting a dab of Ferretone or Ferretvite on your chin
might get you a few kisses!  It might also be that there is something to
your skin that your fuzzie doesn't like.
 
Of course, it might be nothing more than the boy had been running around
and had been sweating earlier and there was a slightly salty taste to his
skin.  Many animals like the taste of salt (my cat, for instance, just
*loves* to lick me when I've been sweating) and will like until the taste
is gone.
 
Please don't make the mistake of thinking that a ferret dislikes you
because it won't kiss you, but it will kiss someone else.  I only have one
ferret (out of six) that gives me kisses.  However, four out of the six
will bite my daughter's feet, but not mine!  Before you go there, *my* feet
don't smell bad, but *her's* does!  Maybe they are trying to get her to put
her shoes *back on*?  :) The ferrets will also aggressively chase any child
that enters my house (under the age of 21), but they don't chase adults,
unless they just want to play.
 
No, I haven't found the manuals in my house, either...though I've looked
high and low!  Just be happy with the diversity of your fuzzies and love
them will all your heart while they are with you.  Also, try to get some
pictures of them...it may help a great deal when they are gone.
 
Todd and the (Quick!  Hide it...here he comes!) Fuzzbutt Rodeo Clowns!
 
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[Posted in FML issue 2630]