The following is a transcript that was located under my bed a year and a
half ago.  At the time I posted it to alt.pets.ferrets.  I have reason to
believe that FLO is once again becoming active in my home, so I'm going to
re-post to FML this information in an effort to drive FLO back into hiding
(Yes Albi, I know you're planning something and its half raisin rations for
the lot of you if you're caught!).
 
            Bryan P. Coffey - Boston, MA - [log in to unmask]
            Weasel Warriors - Albi, Esef, Merri, and Mint
            http://www.gis.net/~bpcoffey/furball.html
 
- - - - - - - - - - - TRANSCRIPT START - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Albi: "Success!  Our SNH has made an fatal system error!  Prepare for
battle.  Ferrets to your posts! Prepare for Operation Cat-As-Trophy!
Operative Mint, your report."
 
Mint: "As you know, being the S&Q, I am able to penetrate deeper into
OUT than our SNH suspects.  While OUT I discovered that our SNH's SO has
brought the KK to OUT and possible UHE's by said KK to DBT may follow."
 
Merri: "I hate military types.  I have no idea what you just said."
 
Mint: (With a dook) "Let me spell it out for you, you dancing fool."
      S&Q - Smallest and Quietest
      SNH - Silly Neutral Human
      KK - Kitty Kommando
      OUT - Offlimits Upstairs Territory
      UHE - Unacceptable Hostile Excursions
      DBT - Downstairs Bedroom Territories
      SO - Auntie Sandy
As I was saying, our territory could be compromised."
 
Albi: "Quit wrestling you two.  This is serious.  We need a plan.
Private Esef, you're the bait.  Specialist Merri, you distract the SNH
and SO.  Mint, you and I will set the trap and lure the KK in."
 
Esef: "I want to play in the water."
 
Albi: "We don't have time.  Go on the stairs and hide in the box of
nuts.  Mint and I will spill as much water as we can in the bathtub and
lay mines.  Merri, get those humans to play fetch or something."
 
(Sounds of water being splashed around in the bathtub.)
 
Esef: "Dook Dook! Alert!  KK approaching."
 
Merri: "Dook Dook! Humans are chasing me!  I'm under the bed with their
keys!  They can't get me."
 
Albi: "Bring it in Esef."
 
Esef: "The cat is afraid of me.  It won't follow.  I'm hiding."
 
Mint: "That coward!"
 
Esef: "I am not!  The cat is past me.  Now I'll chase it to you."
 
Mint: "Not you silly, the cat."
 
Esef: (Scampering after a terrified cat) "Dook Dook!  The cats running
in your direction.  I can't run this fast.  Dook Dook GASP!"
 
Albi: "Mint! NOW! War Dance like there's no tomorrow!"
 
Mint: "The cat is turning.  It's working!"
 
(Splash.  Much dooking is heard. Then a cat, with wet paws, jumps out of
the bathtub and races back up the stairs, over the barricade and into
the OUT.)
 
Albi: "Well done.  It's a victory, but we have a long way to go.
Someday I hope we will be able to join forces with other ferrets around
the globe.  I have a dream..."
 
Mint: (Jumping on Albi) "Tag, you're it!" (Scampers off)
 
Albi: "Dook Dook! I'll get you!" (Chases Mint)
 
Merri: "Last one to the Tube Training Maze gets a bath. Dook!" (Dashes
into a maze of tubes and boxes.)
 
Esef: "I'm going for a swim." (Waddles to the bathtub)
 
SNH: "Have you seen the cat?"
- - - - - - - - TRANSCRIPT END - - - - - - - - -
 
Oh, as an aside.  Last night while watching the X-Files (repeat I think)
I saw something that made me think of the FML.  Setting is California in
a dark building basement.  A man in uniform says "Stop! this is Fish and
Wildlife", then a large wolf-like critter rips the F&W's throat out.  I
swear my ferrets started war dancing just then.  Go figure?
[Posted in FML issue 2631]