FERRET-SEARCH@LISTSERV.FERRETMAILINGLIST.ORG
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Date: | Fri, 11 Dec 1998 19:17:15 -0500 |
Content-Type: | text/plain |
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It's Christmas. I need to decorate the house. Ok, simple 'nuff task.
Silly me. I forgot about the Eight Denziens of Anti-Christ with Fur.
Here's how my day has gone so far.
* Open storage room door to look for Christmas lights.
* Spend 15 minutes pulling ferrets out of various boxes.
* Locate box of Christmas lights.
* Locate ferret hanging from light.
* Toss ferrets out of storage room, slam door shut.
* Realize there is no doorknob on inside of storeage room.
* Spend 20 minute prying hinges off door.
* Drag out Christmas lights.
* Replace hinges.
* Remove ferrets from assorted boxes and bags.
* Shut door to storeage room.
* Bring Christmas lights into living room, dump on floor.
* Find 2 ferrets you dumped the lights on.
* Hand out raisins in effort of have 4 mins of peace.
* Begin sorting lights.
* Begin cursing at the idiot who put lights away without separating
them.
* Stop cursing upon remembering *I* was the idiot who put the lights
away.
* Notice string of lights making a break for the bedroom.
* Grab lights, reel in two ferrets.
* Notice 3 ferrets chewing merrily on lights.
* Gather up lights, pile in chair.
* Begin untangling one set of lights.
* Shake two ferrets out of pant legs, pick one off of top of chair,
remove two from speakers, wonder where other 3 are.
* Notice another string of lights making a break for the bedroom.
* Reel in missing 3 ferrets.
* Untangle one string of lights.
* Being taping lights to the window (No staples allowed).
* Have ferret grab free end of lights and race around you in circles.
* Fall on face, pull taped lights off window.
* Fall prey to eight ferrets while helpless on floor.
* Untangle feet from lights.
* Untangle 4 ferrets from lights.
* Untape 2 from lights.
* Gather up lights, throw them in garbage.
* Gather up ferrets, throw them in cages.
* Grab large bottle of wine.
* Run hot bath.
BAH HUMBUG!
[Posted in FML issue 2521]
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