"If You Wanna Be My Ferret"
Sung to the tune of "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls.
 
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want!
So tell me what you want, what you really really want!
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna,
I really really really wanna dooka-dook-dook!
 
If you want to live here, please just be good,
If you wanna live with me, do what you should.
And don't go stealing my roommate's stuff
'Cause if you really bug her she can be real tough!
 
Chorus:
 
        I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want!
        So tell me what you want, what you really really want!
        I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna,
        I really really really wanna dooka-dook-dook!
 
        If you wanna be my ferret, you gotta steal all my socks,
        Confiscate my raisins and sleep inside a shoe box!
        If you wanna be my ferret, you've gotta be really cute.
        Fert-care ain't that easy but that's the way it is.
 
Be careful on carpet 'cause you know how I feel!
You say you're litter trained...are you for real?
Please don't be hasty, just take your time...
If you poop in corners then I'll say "oh my!"
 
*Chorus*
 
Flop your body down and flatten it all out.
Flop your body down and flatten it all out.
[Posted in FML issue 2492]