Ferreteers:
Dis here is Commander Eli, of the Arcadia Division of the FLO. The Momma
got home from the Orlydoo place and we needs to update all operatives.
First of all - We is infertrated the Northeast! Yesss!!! Noel and Bogart
are both on their way to the cold Northeast where they promises they will
teach them Yankee ferts about sunshine and warm stuffs and how to catch
cockaroaches and how not get fleeeees and stuffs.
Bogart is goin' home with the Ronfert, which is a good thing. The Momma
really likes the Ronfert, she sez. She's a nice girl, Momma sez...I dunno -
She lives Up North & all...well, Bogart's the boy & he'll Suthrunize her.
Noel got took away by some lady named Jan. Jan is nice & stuff, but she
confused The Momma coz she sounds like a fuzzbug. She's tall and she's real
purty & she knows all about the art of loving ferrets,and she smells like a
silly neutral hooman, but she SOUNDS like a ferret. Boris & Natasha came
home with The Momma. They're probably gonna go to Uncle Jim in Winter Haven
to visit for a while.
Stubby and Jackie Hawley became true fert-friends real fast.The Momma kept
sayin Let us not to the marriage of true minds admit impediment - well, you
know how The Momma is...
The Momma met Mary Alice from Nevada who is also a Fredonia mom - hmmmph,
like Heidi v. Fredonia is all that big a deal! The Momma came home all
excited & saying stuffs like Ferret People are so wonderful, Ferret People
are so this-n-that...hmmmph! Now The Momma's home, we gots to remind her
about real Ferret People - US!
The Momma came home real stubborn about nips and nail-clipping and
feets-biting and ferret stuff. She won't let us shred newpaper or bite
ankles. When we fusses, she stops us. Worst of all - she keeps scooping us
all up and sniggling our tummys! Ick! She calls us all her saweetest
boogerbutts, her babiest hunnybunnies, her darlinest patooterheads. Sheees!
So, FLO operatives, if The Momma is an example, we have to bide our time.
When SNH get together they come up with all kinds of ideas & stuff. When
you hear NoNoNo Badferret!!! you'll know things is back to normal. Just
wait, lay flatferret, and very soon all this FML10 stuff will die down and
we can go back to our plans to Take Over The Entire Universe in the Name of
Ferrethood!
The Momma is real tired today, so you can always write back to me on her
email account. hehehe....
Dooks & ferret hugs,
Commander Eli
FLO
Arcadia Division
Tampa Branch
[Posted in FML issue 2199]
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