A recent posting by M.Runyon of the Ferret Lover's Club of Texas caught my
eye in as much as he was apparently associated with ferret olympic
activities down there in the Lone Star State.
 
He's looking for video coverage of a ferret olympics event.  Well, darn, we
just had our ferret olympics up here on the Left(ist) coast, the city of
sniveling liberals who tote Flush Rush bumberstickers on their cars,
Seattle, that is, and there was some guy busily photographing the whole
shew.  We also had a cameraman from one of the local TV stations who filmed
the "in the lake" swimming contest.
 
But who and where these two guys are now, I just don't know.  Maybe I can
track them down and try to get some video for the Texans.
 
Speaking of olympics, we raced ferrets in both swimming and land racing
contests, each of 12 feet in length, and timed them to the 100th second.  We
got good results and plan to do it again, twice, next year and compare the
results.
 
What I'd very much like to do is to encourage all ferret groups to also race
their ferrets over a precisely measured 12-foot course, both in the water
and on the land.  Then send me the results so I can plot them on my graph.
When we get enough data points to make the results significant, then we can
publish the first known water and land speeds of the domesticated ferret.
Yah hooo!
 
The formula for converting the time in seconds to miles per hour is as
follows:
 
Time (sec) divided into 1 (reciprocal); then multiply the reciprocal by the
factor of 17.045452 (round off to 17.046) to get the speed in MPH.
 
The Aussies have lamented the fact that were not metric, as is the rest of
the world, and have requested a metric formula for converting the time in
seconds to kilometers per hour.
 
The Aussies didn't say if they'd be racing metric ferrets, so . . . . ?
 
Anyway the metric is reciprocal of seconds times the factor of 27.426131
will give you the ferret's speed in km/hr.  And of course the 12-foot race
course would require the metric equivalent of 3.658 meters or 365.8
centimeters.
 
And, the're off and running !  Comon' comon'  Bandit!
 
                Glueck auf !  (Good luck !)
 
Edward Frettchenvergnuegen Lipinski,  Der Frettchenlustbarkeitsfuerher !
[Posted in FML issue 2110]