Been up most of the night rewriting two chapters.  Can't think.  400 or so
papers are scattered on the floor.  One has ferret poop on it.  Moose is
hiding under a paper on the disolution of hydroxyapatite in seawater.  I no
longer care.  About the disolution of hydroxyapatite, not Moose.  Moose was
the guy that pooped on the other paper, a Swedish paper on the effects of
exercise on bone morphology.  Couldn't read it anyway.  Too many vowels.  I
have always thought the Swedes should get together with the Hungarians and
Chechs, and even out their spellings.  I think I'll start a movement to
eliminate diacritical marks.
 
FML and mailbox break to repolarize the gray matter.  Both mongooses and
mongeese are proper plurals (Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, 10th ed., page
752).  Moongeese was a brain fart or a sticky keyboard.  Who knows.
Personally, I think its the server.  Maybe Moose did it.  Right now he is
chewing on the corner of Iscan's book on reconstructing life from the
skeleton.  I should stop him.  Stop!  He isn't listening.  Oh well.
 
Read some of the responses to the title challenge.  Several of you have
bested me, but the best and funniest were the ones sent privately, some
which are too gross or naughty to repeat.  I plan on sending back a
response, but have a dull-brain syndrome at the moment, so it will have to
wait a day or so.  Well, here's one:
 
Fertgate: A story about ferrets crossing over into a new dimension- the
kitchen.  [Stargate]
 
Here's one for the CaCa Fish and Gestapo: "Hey, hey we're the monkeys..."
[Ok, no change, but appropriate]
 
Or how about:
 
Ferret Pooper pooped a peck of pickled poop.  [Say that fast five time]
 
The eye thing has been discussed several times on the FML.  Polecats see
blues and red, and ferrets only in the red.  However, domestication is not a
perfect thing, variablity exists, and there have been stories of
polecat-ferret hybrids, so I wouldn't be surprised to find ferrets who could
see into the blues.  What they really like is contrast, and since they can
see red as a color in a black and white picture, it would stand out.  Stella
loved a yellow pingpong ball, until I figgured she liked the contrast, not
the color.  Try to think of the colors like a black and white photographer
would; as tones of gray, not as color, and contrast would explain a lot of
"color" preferences.
 
If a fert owned a hat in France, would it be a "Fur-ay Bur-ay?"
 
Stella has joined Moose in the book chewing.  Amber looked envious, but
trotted off instead to help tear the liner from my archaeology fedora which
at one time was setting on a replica of a klingon skull.  Foster is asleep
across my left foot and I have to go to the bathroom.  I'll wait.  A fedora
liner is waltzing across the room, with a white tail sticking out the side.
Stapled papers are suspicously moving up and down near the desk.  I'm hoping
Foster will wake up soon.  Ooops, he's awake now; someone bit me behind the
knee.  Are you ok, Foster?
 
I hoping aliens will land and cart me off to a zoo somewhere.
 
Bob C and 20 MO Ferrets of Science (Missing Razz)
[Posted in FML issue 2073]