You know ferrets.  Quirky, smart, tenacious.  Well, I have two male
housemates, one of which is a big lug who doesn't look when he wanders
around, resulting in him constantly kicking Potpie back and forth in the
kitchen (her favorite place to hang out and wait for food to drop or someone
to magically lift her to the counter).  Potpie goes after his bare feet
regularly, but he just picks her up and brings her back to me, so she
usually leaves him alone.
 
My second housemate isn't quite so good about it.  In fact, when she goes
for his feet, he moves them.
 
We all know this is a bad idea.  Except, of course, unless you're a ferret.
In which case, it's the best darn thing in the world.  So, of course, he
moves his foot, and Potpie follows.  He jumps backwards to avoid her, and
she FLINGS herself, legs splayed, at his feet and starts dooking.  He
usually ends up running.
 
The other day, Potpie came sniffing around his toes.  He hopped back.
Potpie LEAPT!  Sproing!  Up goes the housemate onto a chair, batman-like!
Shwoop!  Potpie dooks and runs away, mission accomplished.
 
I give the housemate a dour look.
 
He says, "Yeah. I'm scared of the ferret. I know it's stupid."
 
I reply, "You know, she'll gnaw your foot right off...if you sit real still
and give her a couple hours."
 
He glares.
 
I add, "She'll gnaw the other one right off too, after a nap and given a few
more hours."
 
He got off the chair.
 
Melissa and Dictatoress Potpie
 
 ___ Melissa Litwicki __ [log in to unmask] ___
 By the whole newsgroup devoted tennis showing
     it after scarfing fork and laughters
[Posted in FML issue 1986]