Regarding accounting for ferrets before doing dangerous activities, I remind
new ferret owners to avoid death caused by dishwashing and clotheswashing
ferrets.  I always account for both ferrets before starting either activity.
 
Funny, regarding the "nasty" side of ferrets, I usually go out of my way to
explain to ferret-meeters that we have bred ferrets somewhat away from their
ancestrally necessary "aggressive" (really, predatory and defensive,
perhaps) tendencies, especially here in America (where we don't and can't
use them for hunting).  This, coupled with the fact that Dors ends up upside
down happily rubbing her shoulders into their hands (or Seldon ends up
snoozing in their arms) apparently is convincing, because many people
express astonishment or complete disbelief that an animal which looks like
my little fuzzbutt, her ancestor the polecat, could take on a rabbit easily.
 
But, when Dors (who is otherwise very loving) gets ahold of a plastic
bottle, watch out!  She shakes her whole body to "kill" it, and gets
extremely tense and excited.  My theory is that Dors is a bit of a wildcard
since she was privately bred (not MF or any other farm).  Marshall Farms and
other ferret farms seem to do such a good job breeding and socializing their
fuzzies (though even their fuzzies might do in a pet rat or bird, just as a
terrier or beagle might).  I personally believe the early spay/neuter causes
health problems, but otherwise MF is doing a good job.  BTW, I had thought
British ferrets were kind of radical, and I still think they are more
radical than ours (since British ferrets are often working ferrets, perhaps
not bred quite as singly for pets as ours), but Sheila Crompton's ferrets
are really cool; I played *very* roughly with many of her British blokes and
still have all my limbs (and little Tasmanian Devil is getting a bad rap,
Sheila).
 
I was thinking, people always ask me if ferrets bite.  I have come up with a
raft of very polite and successful answers, but I always think it'd be fun
to say "Yes!!  They *transfix* you with the hypnotic stare, then bite you
and *inject* you with paralytic venom, then slowly *gnaw* through your neck
and spine, and the next thing you know, your head's off!".  Fortunately, I
give them instead my polite answers.
 
One other handy thing.  I meet a lot of people, because I walk my units
every weekend, both days, at a large park (the Arboretum in Seattle).  I
usually explain things in such a way as to get people defending "our side"
quickly.  One of the things I say is: regarding people who think ferrets are
vicious and dangerous, I propose that we get a sample of 40 ferrets and 40
cats, and do 4 tests: 1) bathe them (with tester in the tub with them) and
blast the animal full blast with the bathtub faucet after 2) clip all 20
claws 3) clean out ears with oil or q-tip 4) scale their teeth with a
dentist's scaler.
 
Whoever comes out with the least scratches and bites has the least "vicious
and dangerous animal".  People usually nod knowingly by point (1).  Point is
not that cats are bad, but ferret-haters need a bit of perspective.
 
Todd Cromwell
Dors (the nemesis of plastic bottles) and Seldon (snore-o-fuzzbutt)
[Posted in FML issue 1901]