I'll make myself out to seem horribly evil with this post, but I must admit
that I do agree with some of what Tim and Christine said in their FML post
about dying ferrets. I don't like to read that kind of message either. I
honestly can't understand why people want to share those detailed, personal
stories with 3000 strangers. I have shared things on the FML before, like
introducing my ferrets, but have never expected a personal, friendly
response. The FML is not the community many people claim it is.
When I do share things on the list, I don't do so because I want a bunch of
strangers writing to me to tell me how much they understand me. In large
part, they don't. My friends and family understand me, and that's where I
turn when I need support. I suppose I'm lucky in that respect. It's too
bad that so many people on the list don't get support from their friends and
families, and feel they must get it from complete strangers. But, that's
their right. Posting about losses makes some people feel better, and that's
good. But,I generally skip those posts, for much the same reason that
Christine and Tim do - it depresses me.
At the same time, I do realize that there is a special understanding between
those of us who are owned by ferrets, and sometimes even the most
well-intentioned non-ferret person can find it hard to comprehend the
connection we have with our ferrets. For example, when my fiance told a
coworker about the recent surgery of one of our ferrets, the coworker asked
how much the surgery would cost and said we could get two new ferrets for
the price. Ouch!
So, while I agree with their dislike of death and sickness posts, I think
the FML is an appropriate forum for such posts. I don't read them if they
are detailed and depressing, but some people feel the need to post such
messages. So be it. And perhaps some day, I may feel the need to share a
loss with the FML, but it will be a brief mention, and I won't be
disillusioned that the FML is a replacement for the support of my family and
friends. But that's just my take on it.
That's all.
Heather
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[Posted in FML issue 1896]
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