I met with the Sherrif last night, and it was quite a scare at first.  When
I opened the door, he was removing his rank insignia, so I know he was there
as a civilian.  I opened the door all the way, and stepped aside so he could
enter.
 
My heart fell through the floor when I saw him reach beside the door and
pull in a pet carrier roughly the size I have for my kids when I move them
around.  Needless to say I was seriously thinking about slamming the door on
him, but by that time it was a little too late.  He was already inside, and
even if he WAS there as a civilian, you are NOT rude to this guy, not when
he has the power to pull your fuzzies.  (BTW..  mine are at a safe house
right now).  I invited him to sit down and got him some soda (thought it was
not a good idea to offer him anything stronger.  My coffee for instance, has
the nickname 'Road Tar' for when I make it tame, and 'Battery Acid' when I
make it strong..  and I didn't think he'd want a beer either.
 
He must have seen the fire in my eyes and caught the fact that I was staring
at the pet carrier and then him in turn.  This anger dissipated instantly
when above all things, I saw a nose poking out of the carrier!  The sherrif
smiled and said, 'This is why I came over, not to take yours away, but to
see if you can help mine,".
 
He opened the carrier door and out walked a grand old sable lady, a Denver
Ferret (I didn't see the Marshal Tatoo).  She was about seven years old and
was'nt walking too well.  Her hump was more flat than not, and she was
showing definite hair loss around her tail and on the top of her head.  It
turns out that the vet he goes to does not know ferrets and had been writing
this off as 'old age'.  Well, I went into my bedroom and printed out some of
the back FML issues that dealt with adrenal disease and insulinoma, and gave
them to him to read and pass along to his vet.  I also recommended a vet
that I take mine to, who is much more familiar with ferrets.
 
She was a real sweetheart too!  Ah, I hope that when mine grow up, they are
as elegant as this grand lady!
 
We naturally then talked about my ferrets.  He did NOT ask where they were
(for which I am glad..  I don't really like lying to law enforcement or
anyone else for that matter).  The neighbor of mine had indeed filed a
complaint, but the complaint was sitting on the desk of the man now in front
of me.  He was of the opinion that the woman had to have done something
really bad to get Cayanne to squeal, and for Tenaka to bite, since he is
reasonably well aquainted with ferret behavior.
 
The upshot of it is this.  He cannot guarantee anything, but he is going to
talk to several people in the department if they will go along with his
plan.  He says OFFICIALLY that the ferrets would either be taken away by the
local peoples (himself) and tested, or I could ship them out of state.  If
all goes well and if the others agree to go along, then the ferrets will
stay with me, but we would tell everyone else that they have been taken for
testing.  I would have just 'adopted' two new ferrets (still Tenaka and
Cayanne, but new names).  These would be seen by a vet in town (hopefully
not the one the Sherrif went to, because he seems not to know enough.
Still, if I give him more of the back issues... and if I can convince them
to get online and subscribe to the FML!...)
 
I am sorry for not responding directly to everyone's email, but I have
received so many messages of support, I over-ran my account limit and the
system started to purge my mail.  I don't think I will be able to recover
much, if anything.  THis is also why I haven't been able to post... my
account got well and truly bolluxed and has only now become semi-active
again.  My fuzzies are not out of the woods yet, but it seems that I have a
powerful ally in my corner.  Still, until this shakes out, I will need to
keep the fuzzies at the safe place I have them now.
 
I deeply thank all of you (ESPECIALLY Lynda Reid and Tle) for your letters
of support and suggestions.  With the information you have all sent me, I
think that I can pull this one off.  The Sherrif is an incredible man, and
if his subordinates are of the same caliber, then this should be over by the
end of next week.
 
Looks like the good guys may win one yet!!!!!!!
 
Beginning to Dook again!!
 
Bryan: Too bad I don't have the SHERRIF as a neighbor!
 
Tenaka: (Spitooie!) Daddy, I can't get that taste of the meanie out of my
mouth.  Can I have another Raisin coated with Ferretone?
 
Cayanne: Mmmph!  YUM!  Ugh, I think I ate too much peanut butter..  better
switch to Tenaka's raisins!
 
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
   Canonical List of Famous Last Words
 
   (Roleplaying : Fantasy and SF)
 
Hundreds of brave characters lost their lives during thousands of
roleplaying sessions leaving us their last words.  We'll never forget them.
Rest In Peace.
 
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
 
084-"No, I'm sure there's some stipulation that says a disintegrate spell
     won't work if the spellcaster casts it on himself.  Here, I'll prove it."
[Posted in FML issue 1696]