A third party made me aware of the criticism/controversy over Dayna going on
on the FML.  I was six days behind in my reading, otherwise I would have
posted this sooner.  Now that I have read all that has been said, I think it
is appropriate for me to give you my own experience with Dayna concerning
money.
 
I read every word of the posts about Foggy, of course.  After a few days, a
clause in one sentence surfaced frequently in my mind, and I deduced that
Dayna was not eating as well as she should in order to spend more of her
money on her fur kids.  I e-mailed BIG to ask if he thought it was
appropriate for me to say anything about this (what did I know?  I was/am
pretty new here).  He basically left it to me to find out if she was really
short of grocery money, in which case I would post something.  Please note:
Dayna did not say she was short of money; she did not say she needed food;
she did not ask me to contact her.
 
When I e-mailed her, she explained a little about her work and experience.
She put off my question about food money until the second time I asked.
When she admitted that she might not be eating as well as she should at the
moment, she also explained that she felt this was part of the life work she
had chosen, so I should not think she was complaining.  It took at least two
more e-mail exchanges to convince her that people would actually enjoy
giving to help her and Foggy, because it gives those of us who can't "do" a
chance to participate.
 
So ... after I had sworn I would not give Dayna's address away to anyone,
she allowed me to post to ask for contributions, and asked me to send her
the e-mail and snail mail addresses so she could thank people.  She had to
trust me as far as her address was concerned, but I made sure no one had to
worry about whether they could trust me with the money.  I asked everyone to
make their checks out to Dayna, so that I would just be the person to
forward them.  I received a lovely gift of the Rainbow Bridge story and
handmade ferret stationery in return, and I was touched by the time taken
and thoughtfulness shown.
 
My personal experience with Dayna has been that she was reluctant to accept
help and was sweetly and generously grateful for the help she did receive.
I believe this is more to go on for making a judgement than doubt and
speculation are.  Karen Carby (of coupon program fame) could probably vouch
for how suspicious and careful I can be.  In Dayna's case I have permitted
my heart and gut a say in the matter, as well as my brain.
 
Judith White
[Posted in FML issue 1619]