Your horoscope for today, May 31, 1996
Aries (Mommy): Secret hiding places featured [I discover yet another 452
musteline IRA accounts behind, under, between, and even _on top of_, for
God's sake, every nook, cranny, and piece of furniture in the place],
relationships previously kept hidden will burst open ("_What_ did you say we
have? -- Oh, damn, we're out of roach motels, let's go get some more . . . "
<sigh>]). Opportunity exists to take greater charge of your own destiny --
it will be your choice! ["Did you say Ferrets Northwest has some openings?
< :]= >]
Gemini (Puggsley, the cat): Make fresh start, attend to basic issues
[Puggsley bats Bart a good one after Bart takes a nice bite out of
Puggsley's tail again], do repair-work [Puggsley takes about an hour
grooming the sting out of said tail afteward]. A different kind of love on
horizon. ["Bart, stop trying to do that with the cat!"] Care of pets
figures in scenario [Puggsley finds roach crawling out from behind stove,
falls in love with it, heroically interposes self between it and Mommy to
keep Mommy from summarily sending it to that Great Roach Motel in the Sky].
Leo involved (Bart contrives to sneak into Mommy's roommates room again,
panics Sari, gets jumped on by Lisa, runs screaming out of room again with
Mommy's roommate in hot pursuit).
Cancer (Bart and Jessie, ferrets): Moon position highlights stirring of
creative juices (Bart and Jessie hunt assiduously to find new hidey-holes
for their IRA accounts, succeed, begin porting food out of their food-dish
to new bolt-holes, one piece of ferret-chow at a time). Focus on change,
travel, physical attraction (like an idiot, Mommy takes Bart on leash to the
near-by park, where Bart instantly falls in love with one of the HUGE Canada
ganders and attempts to consummate his undying love for same by going for
the thing's knee; Mommy just barely manages to rescue Bart before gander
retaliates -- why rescue, Mommy isn't sure, must have been relfex or
something). Intuitive intellect services as accurate guide -- follow hunch!
("That's right, Bart, there sure is food up here -- and if you think I'm
gonna give you my tuna-fish sandwich, you got another think coming!!!").
Aquarian plays role ("Uh-oh -- somebody pull Bart out of the gargoyle
fountain again!").
Leo (Mommy's roommate): Check Gemini message for added information.
Different modes to transportation featured along with accelarated social
activity ("Could I borrow the car again? _This_ time, Lisa's managed to
ding the claw on her _other_ front foot, in a fight with her mother!").
Surprise delivered to doorstep! ["Whaddaya mean, the Park Department and
the EPA are suing us about Bart?"] Write and publish ["Hey, Yael, maybe I'll
do one of those weasel-scopes for FML myself, whaddaya think? <g>"]
Virgo (Mommy's rising-Sign): Previous concepts undergo transformation ["I
don't _believe_ it -- Bart really _can_ do that! Oh, _gross_!"] Learn
rules, break them, tear down in order to rebuild on magnificent structure
["I don't give a damn _what_ the manger says, I'm gonna take that cupboard
out so I can clean the weasel-hoards out from behind it -- that's the _only_
way we can get rid of these **** roaches once and for all!!"] Trip involves
Taurus, Scorpio individuals ["I don't care _how_ stubborn you are, Bart --
you're _full_ of it!"] -- legal matter featured ["You won't believe this --
the Park Department really _is_ gonna sue us over Bart!"].
[Posted in FML issue 1588]
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