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ADDRESS TO : COMMANDER IN CHIEF DODGER
FROM: SPECIAL OPS. WHIDBEY
FLO HQ NORTHERN SECTOR ( QUEBEC CITY DIVISION )
 
 
Commander,
 
Seeing how the CKP forces (Cannine Kaos Patrol) have never ending food
supplies, i have taken it upon myself to execute day and night manoeuvers,
and steal their supplies and stashing it for ourselves in case of
emergency...  During one of these raids i was caught by the so called
"neutral humans".  They decided then to torture me into telling them where
all of the supplies had been hidden.  The torture method was atrocious.  It
consisted of one of the "humans" to be without any protective clothing, and
to hold me under a powerful "chinese water torture device" know to them as a
shower...However due to my "protective winter coat" this did not work.  Then
came the soap, and my protective coat had lost all of it's water resistance.
The torture was not to be over; i was passed to the other human and rubbed
the very wrong way.  This is where i managed to get away from them; still
wet and running through my territory the humans gave chase.  Knowing the
surroundings better than them, i got away.  Still wet i took the direction
of the humans bedroom and went under the bed to find my old friend, purple
rubber alligator sleeping amongst the dust bunnies.  Clinging to me i then
proceed to go on their bed between the sheets and dried myself, the now wet
dust bunnies were all over their pillows.  Cautiously i then went back to
the torture chamber and bravely climbed into the tub to retreive and hide
the "chewy rubber water stopper" and deprave the so called "neutral humans"
of ever doing any indoor swimming.  Unleast until they find it.  My question
to you Commander and any other agents out there is; are the humans in your
area of responsability, really neutral or do they seem to take side with the
CKP, or the FDI or other ennemy forces???  I will await further instructions
from you; in the meantime i will do my upmost to disturb the CKP forces and
distract the humans.
 
Special Ops. WHIDBEY
 
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[Posted in FML issue 1485]