Seems like I put my foot in it last post; the San Juan Islands are off
Washington, not Oregon. I knew that. I've been talking to people on the
islands for the last few weeks, so I should know. Actually, part of the
post was missing, probably at this end with this wacky server (meaning
me, although if anyone wishes to suggest it was SHOWME's fault, I'd be
happy to shift the blame....).
 
Anyway, what was printed in the FML was not what I saved to my hard drive.
So all you kiddies in FML land, call up the old post, cut out the paragraph,
and substitute the following (what I thought I sent):
 
As for the sunny sand and the salt water: One consistant thing about
wildlife biologists is that when it comes time to study an animal, they tend
to go where its easy to find them (unless there are too many biting flies or
mosquitoes, in which case they go to the second best place; the zoo).  The
closest wild relative of the ferret is the European polecat.  In New
Zealand, the greatest populations of polecats/ferrets are found near the
lagoons.  In Britain, there is no accurate nor published account of the
feral fitch population that I can find (I have called people, and believe
me, it isn't cheap).  I was told this was partially due to continuing losses
during hunting and excapes, so it is hard to say if feral fitch seen near
occupations are truely wild (presumably some are, but since every British
ferreting book I have read suggests that owners deny they have lost any
ferrets, and ferrets are still associated with poaching, it is doubtful
accurate results can ever be obtained) and partial due to lack of
conern/interest.  However, polecats, hunted to virtual extinction throughout
most of the island, are still found in coastal swampy areas near Wales.  The
only reported spot in North America where a colony of feral ferrets used to
live (they were introduced to control the European rabbit) was the San Juan
Islands off the Washington coast.  State officals have reported the
population to be extinct, "leaving" with the rabbits.  Various claims have
been made-sans any confirmable evidence-about islands in the Mediteranean
and off the coast of Oregon.  Notice a commonality?
 
To save valuable online time, I first write my posts in Word 6 offline.  I
am a liberal user of the cut-n-paste method, and often rewrite under the
first draft, clipping parts as needed to save time.  When finished, I cut
the old stuff, save the document, then copy the text to my clipboard.  I go
online, then paste it into my mail message.  In this case, after saving the
original, I probably accidently clicked the paste key and replaced the good
stuff with the stoopid garbage before copying the whole mess to the
clipboard.  It was late, and I didn't proofread.  Usually, this works wel,
but this isn't a good example.  I developed the method after having so many
troubles with my server having slip problems, and dropping out half way
through the message.  I also download my messages--with Fetch--and read them
in Word 6 rather than online.  Much easier to read, and I save my online
time for tracking down nude pictures of female Star Trek actors (not really,
but it sounded good, right?) I'm sure it is a method that AOL would approve
of, if they only thought of it.  Well, I was told an idiot could operate a
Mac, and I'm living proof.  Sorry for any misunderstandings.
 
As for the feral population in the San Juan islands, they are history.  I
have talked to a very disagreable person who claims to see them, but can't
seem to distinguish between lost pets (yes, ferrets are kept as pets on the
islands; at least one vet takes care of them) and a breeding colony.  This
person sees feral ferrets like McCarthy saw communists.  According to
him/her, they are everywhere.  I have offered to spend some time checking
out the "sightings", but then locations and times become less clear and
farther in the past.  Because she/he is a professional, and some readers
might know him/her, I will withhold her/his name until I have a little more
evidence to whack his/her claims heavily about the head and shoulders.  But
after this summer.....
 
BTW, there is a very informative article in the April 1996 issue of "Natural
Pet" regarding pet nutrition.  It is slanted towards cats, but the issues
can apply to all carnivores.
 
One last thought that has been rattling through my empty head.  I know a
sure-fire way to not only make money, but put ferrets in a good PR light.
Tests have shown ferrets to be as smart as dogs (or smarter), and are easily
trainable.  They have a sense of smell as good or better than the pooch.
Why not teach them to search for drugs or trapped people?  They are
naturally inquistive, respond to positive training methods, and are much
easier to transport than their phylogenetic relatives.  Ferrets could be
taught to hole up next to the victim, and a transponder could send out the
location.  This is basically what has been done for centuries in rabbit
hunting, so why not for people or contraband?  Funny thought...can you
imagine the Calif F&G using ferrets to sniff out poachers or illegal game?
Or the California border guards using them to find dope?  Best yet, how
about at the inspection stations to search for, you guessed it, illegal
fruit and raisins?
 
If anyone uses my idea, my ferrets get 10% of the confiscated raisins.
 
Bob and the 13 Raisin Watchferrets
[Posted in FML issue 1527]