I just gots to share this with you guys.  'cause I am starting to believe
that if I keep sharin' this stuff with my non-fert friends & family, they
really are going to put me away (hehe haha hoho, to the funny farm).  Did
any of you see those fad-type toys that made their appearance in the
stores around Christmas time.  You know, the plastic balls that were about
4" in diameter with a battery operated motor inside and a furry
real-bad-type-imitation of a ferret attached.  When you turn on the motor,
this ball rolls across the floor as if this furry thing is a ferret chasing
it around.  Well, before Christmas, they were about $7 each and I just
couldn't see spendin' that kinda money on no imitation ferret.  But a
couple of weeks ago, I noticed this store that I frequents still had two of
them that were out of their package.  I had already noticed them before, so
I knows they'd been sittin' there for a long time.  So, I asked the manager
if'n he'd take a buck a piece, and he says, "Heck, you can have them BOTH
for a buck.  I just want them out of here." Well, weren't I just about
tickled, but I did wonder if'n I shoulda offered only a quarter.
 
A couple of friends that was shoppin' with me was all astonished (& kinda
embarassed) that I'd even ask such a question, but liken I told 'em, "What's
the worst they gonna say?  NO!"
 
Anyhow's, I been saving these toys for a cloudy, boring afternoon liken
today are and I suddenly remembers 'em.  So I gets one out while Big Bad
Bilbo & Little Miss Missy are out of their cage playin' under my bed.  I
turns it on and puts it on the floor and it starts a wigglin' and rollin'
around like the poor imitiation of a ferret that it are.  Pretty soon, here
come Missy.  At first she just runs over to within about 2 feet of this
floppin around thang and stares at it.  Then she looks back over her
shoulder right at ol' Bilbo who, by the way, ain't got no more than his nose
sticking out from under that bed.  All she sees is Mr. BIlbo lookin' at her
like she's 'bout half crazy for getting that close to anything as dangerous
as that thing flopping around out there.  But, Missy, she's just kinda
frozen, and four or five times she looks back and forth between Bilbo and
this floppin' around make believe fert.  Finally, Missy realizes she ain't
gonna get no help from Bilbo in takin' care of this new critter, so she
pounces on it.  Not mean like, but kinda like she figures this is a Junior,
JUNIOR FLO agent and she's gonna teach it real quick the proper way to act
in the presence of Junior FLO agents like her and Bilbo.  She snatches this
thing by the back of what would be the neck if'n it were a real fert and
starts headin' backwards towards the FLO training grounds under the bed,
motorized ball and all.  Well, between my dang near uncontrollable laughter
& her persistence, I almost didn't get it back, but I's already done learned
my lesson, and there just ain't gonna be no FLO training for no toy like
this unless General Ken is there to supervise such activities.
 
Well, my FML buddies, I's most happy to announce that Little Miss Missy
done earned herself the very next FLO rank after "Junior Agent in
Training", whatever he heck'n that be.  But, Bilbo? I don't knows what we's
gonna do about him.
 
Ken (Just hopin' we's ticklin' somebody's funny bone besiden our own)
Missy (Does this mean I out rank Bilbo now?  hehehe!!!)
Bilbo (I was merely standing in ready reserve in the event that our
        front line FLO troop needed defensive reinforcements, hmmmph!)
[Posted in FML issue 1505]