Dear John;
 
My most sincere condolences on your bud"s passing...  The first is always
the hardest, though any passing of a loved one is always hard.  I've been
thru too many passings myself.  I have also seen the writings and talked to
other people as they struggle with the ill health of loved ones.
 
I heard awhile ago of the concept of a "good death"..  At the time I thought
there can never be such a thing.  I have seen two and four legged people
going thru many types of illnesses and passings.  When my Squeeky passed on
in her sleep, my Son said "at least she went at home, with her family,
without pain, what more could you ask for if it was your time?"..  I have
come to know that this has much wisdom in it.  It made me feel better, and I
suppose it could qualify as a "good death".
 
Having lost my whole birth family and a marriage thru divorce in only four
years I was pretty much traumatized feeling like everyone is dying, and it's
been a slow road to realize that the physical transition is part of life,
and it doesn't mean the total end..  (personal belief, but it helps me)..
 
I know Bud knows how much you love him, and have to believe that you know
how much he loves you.  I also think that being with you helped him cross
over, since all bridges are built of love.  I also believe that love is the
one eternal that transcends all boundaries.
 
I hope you keep the love you share with Bud in your heart always, until you
can be united once again.
 
    Sincerely, Gary
 
Violence is not strength,  Compassion is not weakness.    From Camelot.
[Posted in FML issue 1424]