Dear FML:
Only 5 days after I wrote "An Eulogy" for a few who had requested I do so, I
unexpectedly lost my Zoe.
 
It has been a week today since I lost her, and I still have not fully grasped
that she is gone.  Zoe was only 9 months and 2 days old. On Friday, over a
week ago, I found her lying on the carpet and picked her up.   Her limbs felt
cold and as I cuddled her against me, I quickly took note of her paleness.
 She was nearly paper white.  I will not go into all the details, because I
cannot.  However, after a quick check-over, I found nothing except rapid
heart with some atrial fibrullation.  Lungs were clear and temp was normal.
She was very lethargic.  Her heart was struggling to get oxygen to her body.
 
She was tested for everything and received a transfusion Friday from two
large hobs.  Everything was negative or normal.  Organ profiles, normal.
Bloodwork, normal with exception of virtually no red blood cells.  After a
very rough weekend for both me and for Dr. Jean Wardell, we lost her early
Monday morning.  Jeanne did a necropsy and Dr. Bruce Williams is doing the
path.  Perhaps he will be able to give us some answers, but I have a funny
feeling we may never know. Her bone marrow's ability to produce red blood
cells crashed.  Either hemolysis or aplastic anemia - I don't know.  With
tests and on necropsy, no organs seemed affected - which is unusual in such a
severe case.  There was basically no history.
 
As I commented on FML when I lost Dusk several weeks before Zoe, I have been
so lucky.  Dusk was only the third loss in over 11 years at that time.  Late
this fall will mark 12 years of being owned by ferrets, and we have had a
good share of problems, but lucky with a low loss.  The loss of Zoe is
especially hard because she was so young.  I grieve for her short life.  And
as I grieve for her, so do others who knew her.  It has been a bad year for
many, and I grieve also for others lost dear ones.
 
Zoe was a beautiful black sable jill.  At a show, earlier this year, she was
entered into Black Sable Specialty.  Zoe - short name - appeared at the top
of the list of black sables in this class, with many grand names following.
Sexy Sadie, owned by Diane Rogers was also showing.  Sexy Sadie had never
been defeated when shown in Black Sable Specialty.  As I looked around the
ring after the judge finished with Zoe, I took note of all the beautiful
ferrets waiting to be shown.  I went off to do other things, and didn't hear
the call back for awards.  Finally, Charlie Fellows, the MC, bellowed my
name over the loud speaker and I worked my way through the crowd to find out
what he wanted.  Much to my shock, Zoe had taken the trophy.  I have taken
Best Black before, but not against Sexy Sadie, and wee Zoe did it.  Sexy
Sadie, in fact, is a cousin to three of my babies, including Zoe.  And I
brag here in her memory.  She was so beautiful and full of life and
mischief.  Ah, my precious Zoe -- I am glad I wrote "an Eulogy" before I
lost you, because I could not do it now.  But for all the pain of loss I
suffer now, I would not trade it against one second of time I had with you.
Thank you, God, for giving me Zoe for as long as I could have her.  And all
of you in FML land - go and hug and kiss your fuzzies for me, and for Zoe.
love, meg
[Posted in FML issue 1292]