Hi Alayne,
 
You wrote:  "This ferret is, to put in mildly, quite mean. . . .  Could
this just be a bad ferret?"
 
It might be possible that your ferret has something organic wrong with
him, but since he's a whole male, and since you have another whole male
(whom you no doubt smell like), it's not surprising that he would try
to bite you.  Whole males will generally fight with each other pretty
seriously (apparently to death, although I've only seen mild bleeding
from the back of the neck when a pair at a breeder accidentally were
let out to play together).  The way they decide what to attack is by
smell.
 
When I've been handling a whole male, and I want to handle another, the
first thing I do is (carefully) pick up the new male and rub him
wherever the other ferret had touched me.  This masks the scent of the
previous ferret and keeps the new guy from wanting to attack.  Ed
Lipinski of Ferrets Northwest showed me this trick, and it's worked
great every time I've tried it.
 
I've met hundreds of ferrets (and been given one "biter"), but I
haven't met any unsolvable behavior problems.  After six months with
the "biter," I still wouldn't hand him to children, who might not
recognize the warning signs that he's thinking of biting, but he's
become very attached (emotionally, I mean, not by the teeth) to my
girlfriend, and hasn't had any biting incidents in months.
 
If I were anywhere near Cleveland, I'd be happy to come handle him and
see how he behaves.  I wouldn't recommend sticking fingers in his mouth
if he bites really hard.  That's more something you do to let a kit
know not to nip too hard.  Instead, try scruffing him (just enough to
get a hold of him, not enough to make him shut down), tweak his nose
gently, and say "NO" firmly, if he tries to bite.  If knowing about the
scent problem doesn't help, perhaps you can just handle him carefully
(i.e., keep him gently scruffed all the time he's in biting range) and
be ready to dodge a bite.  I'd expect standard behavioral training
techniques to at least help out, if applied firmly, consistently, and
with love.
 
Good Luck,
Dennis
 
[Posted in FML issue 0935]