This will be long, but I believe it's necessary.
 
In Issue 745, Howard Davis writes:
"IMHO, there is really no excuse for keeping a ferret if you cannot
care for it, and you certainly are not doing the ferret a favor"
 
and in Issue 746, Al Horne writes:
"I, too, was wondering why V. was even hesitating to get the best
for the ferret that is available...[story about his hamster
deleted]...one point of the story here is that, with the hamster,
I was perhaps mistaken for hoping that the malady could be treated
and thereby prolonging some very real agony"
 
Both of these remarks are obviously directed at me, and while some
of the most supportive letters I received during the past few weeks
were from people on the FML (thank you so much!), I can't tell you
how upset I am to read such comments from people who are obviously
ignorant of the full situation, and rather unrealistic about it as
well.
 
I originally asked for advice because my ferret, Antigone, was
looking a little thin, and I was worried about her weight.  Since
my message wasn't posted to the FML for several days, no one was
aware that by the time you read it, I had already decided that Antigone's
situation was more serious than I first realized, and had
taken her to see the vet.  She diagnosed Antigone as having a
foreign body in the stomach, and gave me an estimate for surgery of
almost $1000.00.  There is NO WAYT I can afford that, so I lef
t Antigone with the vet for Xrays, hoping that it would turn out to
be something I *could* afford to pay for. The Xrays (although not
completely conclusive) suggested that the vet was correct).
 
Since I could not afford the surgery, the vet told me that the best
option after that was to get Antigone on antibiotics, a medication
to soothe her digestive system, and a laxative to try to help pass
whatever was inside her.  At the same time, I started a desperate
search for a vet who would perform the operation at a price I
*could* afford (no luck).  I bought a scale to monitor her weight,
kept her in a separate cage from my other ferret, Minima, so I could
monitor her stool and make sure she continued not to be actually blocked
(which she never was), and fed her chicken baby food\sustacal\duck
soup\mushy Iams kitten food with a dropper every few hours *around
the clock* for over a week.  She slept a lot, ate what I fed her,
and played with Minima several times a day.  I don't believe she
was in pain, *she maintained her weight*, and she continued to pass
feces normally.  After a week, it became obvious that she wasn't giong
to pass the foreign body, and when her weight started to drop, I
and Nick (her daddy) took her to the vet, who put her to sleep.
We were with her and held her as she passed away, then I closed her
eyes, we kissed her, and put her into a wool-lined box with her
favorite toy, food, and some apple juice.  I took her to my parents'
house and buried her under a flowering bush in their backyard.  She
was seven years old, and I never knew a sweeter-tempered ferret.
 
I keep my ferrets in a large clean cage when I'm not at home, but let
them roam and play when I am at home (which is often).  They eat
Science Diet and linatone, and get lots of love and attention.
Both of them came to me from situations where they weren't getting
much love, attention or care, and they have had much better lives
since then.  I take them to the vet when they are obviously sick,
and last Tuesday, I had to make the hardest and most painful decision
of my life:  to have Antigone put to slep *before* she was
suffering, or in pain.
 
The suggestion was made that I ought to have taken Antigone to a
ferret shelter, which could have cared for her.  (1) There are no
ferret shelters in Toronto or nearby, (2) no ferret shelter (or the
Toronto Humane Society) would have paid for the operation, or I
*would* have given her up, and gladly (for her sake), and (3) no
ferret shelter (or the Humane Society) could *possibly* have
cared for her as I did during her last week, or have been able
to judge how she felt during that time.  She would have simply
been left in a cage, and either put down when (if) they  noticed
she was sick, or she would have just died alone and in pain.
 
I have known, loved, and *cared for* this ferret for *years*, and
I can't tell you how upsetting it is to be accused of neglect
or irresponsible ownership because I can't spend $1000.00 on my ferret.
 
I apologive for the length of this message, but it was necessary
for me to say these things.  The past two weeks have been the worst
time of my life.  Thank you again to all those FMLers who sent me
advice and words of support and comfort.
 
Victoria
 
[I should point out that I almost decided to block Davis' message.
I would like to keep the FML non-accusatory.  We're all friends here.
And we often have good reason for doing the things that we do.
So, can we keep the preaching to a minimum?  Please?]
 
[Posted in FML issue 0751]