Yesterday, at sew day for Crafty Weasels, I did something that reminded
me of something I had realized years ago. The monthly meeting was held
at Florence Love's house. She has 3 ferrets. One of them who is as
sweet as could be, and 2 boys that have quite the reputation of being
"biters". Their names are Evander (yes, as in the boxer! and Tyson, as
is Mike Tyson, the guy who bit a chunk of his opponent's ear off! That
should give you an idea how real the threat of a serious bite is. Now
over the years, Florence has done and A M A Z I N G job with these two
boys, showering them with love and the biting has gotten better, but
still I for one, hesitate (actually I just don't do this!) in putting
fingers or noses in front of either one of them.

As the day passed, I kept seeing Evander up at the clear barrier that
separates the kids room from the rest of the house, standing there,
scratching at it with a look that clearly said, "Please hold me". And
to that look I replied, I'm not going to even try to hold you, you
bite!

At the end of each Sew Day, we get a group picture, and we almost
always have a fuzzy or two in the picture. Someone asked me,"Do you
want to hold Tyson?" to which I repleied, "No, he bites"

My point of all this is in that moment, I realized that I had been
denying him love and affection because he was "a biter". Not wanting to
risk being bitten because I want to keep my nose and fingers with me
for quite a while longer, I wouldn't hold him. It wasn't their fault.
Something happened to them to have them be this way, And as I said,
Florence has done WONDERS with these boys. Here are these two poor
babies being denied love, affection, and attention when THAT is the
VERY thing they need the most. Florence gave them them all that they
needed and continues to do so, I didn't even try, I just stayed back
from them (well I did say hello...from a distance) I just denied them,
I didn't even try because of their past bad reputation as "biters"

I think I'm trying to say is that a bad reputation, a simple word
or two, can be accepted and that the person or pet can be treated
accordingly because of this reputation, or one can love anyway for who
they themselves see in front of them. They can be given them what they
truly need. It seems to me that most of the time the ones with the bad
reputations are the very ones who need to be taken for themselves the
most, not be known by their reputations. I totally treated Evander and
Tyson according to their reputations. Florence was WELL AWARE of the
boys reputations years ago, but she chose to take them for themselves.
Poor, frustrated, scared boys. It was the love that came from doing
that, that changed those boys, yet still I was afraid, because of that
bad reputation. I had a "biter" too, years ago, a very bad "biter" and
had the same resuts with giving her what she needed,and not basing my
complete opinion of her bad reputation.

So, back to that moment when I thought, "no I won't hold you because
of your biting reputation", I was reminded. Each and every ferret is
different, each and ever human is different. I should make my own
opinions before I act on the words of anothers. I'm so sorry Evander
and Tyson, I'll do better next time.

Sorry for the long winded rambling.

Dooks To All Of You,
Sue

[Posted in FML 7488]