Avast! Unweigh Your Anchor and List Awhile, Matey!

I did not know this. Most if not all cats, dogs, ferrets, and other
assorted animals who are euthanized, wind up in a rendering plant. A
rendering plant is the absolute last stop for dead pets. Here the
remaining value in their cold dead bodies is extracted by chemical
and mechanical means quite horrible to consider.

This is not the place where our beloved pets retire after crossing the
rainbow bridge; at least we don't want to even think of this finality,
this last stop on the way to recyclic oblivion.

The extraction products that are squeezed, crushed, and ground from
euthanized pets have values relative to the needs of the pet food
market for cheap substances that are part and parcel of a given pet
food. Does my dog eat the rendered part of a dog that died some short
time ago? My cat - does she eat cats? and dogs and what else?

Consider the largest ferret breeder in Obama land - Marshall Farms. How
many ferrets do they breed every year? Two thousand, three thousand, or
even ten thousand? Does any body on the FML know the actual number? If
so, what is the number? And of this number, how many dead, sickly or
malformed?

How many birthing ferrets, every year, are put out to . . . ahem, dare
I say /pasture/, because their repro machine is way, way less than it
was in their earlier fecunded years? Who knows how many? Somebody
knows.

We, not knowing for certain what these numbers are, we can be certain
that no matter how many are wasted, a good business man would not let
this after market go down the sewer when with a little imagination and
entrepreneurship, some financial benefit can be made in marketing the
dead ones. Especially the dead ones who have been churned into mush and
muck, along with their flea collars, their other collars, their tags,
their micro chips and the remaining still potent sodium phenobarbital.

What is being said here? Wasted ferrets, instead of being a business
loss, can positively influence the bottom line of a company that deals
in ferrets, alive and dead. That's not too much of a stretch, ladies
and gentlemen, yes?

Would it be the Irony of Ironies that the ferret food called Totally
Ferret is . . . well, just that, no more, no less, but wholly and
totally?

It's the pioneers that gets the arrows, yes?
Edward Lipinski

[Posted in FML 6243]