Georgia Wood, past eccentric, quirky and bohemian mother to Kouri used
to entertain us with her various posts about the interesting things
that would happen to her ferret. Here are a few posts:

Oh, that Kouri!

Ring, ring. me: Yes, hello.

them: Hello, may I please speak to Kouri Garber?

me: Wood, his last name is Wood.

them: Oh, I have Garber.

me: Well, what did you need him for.

them: This is the ________ Insurance Company, and he gave this number
as his work number after his automobile accident yesterday.

Wow, I always knew that boy was talented but Taking The Car Without My
Knowledge?!!

me: Uh, I think somebody's pulling your leg, Kouri is a ferret, and
this is our home phone.

them: Your ferret is named Cory? [I asume that's the spelling she had]

me: Yes, it's spelled K-o-u-r-i, would you like me to go get him?

them: No, that's ok, what a coincidence.

I didn't tell her Kouri gets offers of credit cards and he belongs to
the Handyman Club of America - she might have thought I was the one
pulling her leg by pretending my son (or whoever) was a ferret!

That's right people, a ferret with a gun! Two inches long, it's just a
small handgun, looks about like my father's old Colt, and came with a
little holster. Here's the kicker - it's a real working cap pistol! I
have, quite inadvertantly, bought my ferret a REAL gun! Mahahahaha! I
had no idea it was functional.

Yesterday I looked at small rifles, but they came in kits with a
military uniform, boots, helmet etc., and were $15. Phooey. The one I
got today was from a Rite Aid that is closing, and it was the last one.
I even saw packages of caps on the next hook but had no idea they were
for that gun.

Can you imagine what would happen if Kouri's gun were 'fired' in the
house? Six ferrets would bottle brush their tails, and two would poof.
Three ferrets would run and leap into tubes and other hidy places, and
two ferrets would stand and look bewildered. And Kouri would jump up
and down and fluff up all his fur and ask me to do it again!

Kouri LOVES his gun. I was holding it against his chest, wondering if I
could make him a shoulder holster, and he GRABBED it and wouldn't let
go. When I finally got it pried out of his mouth, he clutched it with
his paws. Just about the time I got it away from him, one of his paws
slipped into the split ring (keyring) that's attached to the holster.
I tell you, that boy is taking his NRA vows a bit too seriously!

Kouri, who is a member of the National Rifle Association was presented
with a Millennium Honor Roll achievement certificate in honor of his
distinguished service in defense of liberty and the Constitution of
the United States, especially the Second Amendment right to keep and
bear arms. Scheesh, I just gotta get that boy a gun! It's got a gold
seal, and signed by Charlton Heston, the whole nine yards!

I've (already, and it just arrived yesterday) framed the certificate
and plan to hang it in my cube.

Georgia, who is extremely proud of her boy!

[Moderator's note: For those who are new to the list, yes, Kouri is a
ferret.  He seems to get on a lot of mailing lists ;-)  BIG]

[Above Moderator's note was part of that old post. BIG]

[Posted in FML 5775]