Oh ferret love slaves! It is I, the Great Robed One. Today is the big
20th anniversary and to celebrate that I am going to pick the winner
of the caption contest for that compromising BIG photo with Leka the
Lovely on the Internet. We had a total of 27 submissions. If you have
not seen them, you do need to take a look because they are insane.

http://www.skweezeme.net/big.html

Names were not put up along with submissions so I do not know who said
what. It was pretty fun to enjoy the words for what they were and not
for who said them. But I must say that some of our FML personalities
are so strong you can almost guess who said what! Now that's funny
right thar, I don't care WHO ya're ... I'll tell yew whut. It's a good
thing this was just for fun and not for a real prize because I had no
idea what I was getting myself into with the vast creativity that drips
off this list. No way would I have been able to pick a winner with
something on the line other than pure fun.

Okay, just for giggles (hold on, let me screw Wolfy's giggle pin down 
tighter first), the winner is:

10. My question is ...where is the REAL Big.....anyone can tell that is
a blowup doll, just take a close look you can see that she is not quite
finished blowing him up yet....I think she has a plan for that doll,
maybe she is going to smuggle him into California to help with Fish and
Game.

Honorable mentions:

9. And for my next trick, watch me pull a ferret out of my nose.

5. BIG is strapped for cash, and he has never liked his nose. He can't
afford a board-certified plastic surgeon, so he is investigating
Black-Market Rhinoplasty. You know how when people go for a nose job,
they get to see a 'before' and a hypothetical 'after' photo of the
possible post surgical result? Well, BIG is shopping cheap. Really
cheap. He is going to have his nose done by a plastic surgeon's weasel
at a greatly reduced rate of service. What you seee there is the
"after" picture that the plastic surgeon took to show BIG what kind of
result he can expect. Yes, that's what you can reasonably anticipate
looking like when a pygmy wolverine perforates your nose. If BIG wants
to look at a few more "after" results he should take a look at Sukie
and Renee Downs. I don't know who did Sukie's work, but Puma did Renee
Downs.

This was the best fun since the Panty Contest so many years ago! Thank
you for the great fun and participation. We'll leave this up for
everyone to enjoy. Feel free to add on any other funny captions and
ideas that come to you by emailing Robin J at [log in to unmask]
Because in a ferrets world? The fun never ends.

The Great Ferret Oracle
ps, for your prize you may approach BIG and give him a great big
squeeze. He'll give you a BIG warm hug and a BIG kissarooni right
back at cha.

That's our beloved Bill ...

[Posted in FML 5826]