>Ping is He replies to Scott:
>
>Now, I've met Bob Church.  I've sniffed him.  He is *not* neutered.
>What would he know about it?  Don't listen to him or any of the other
>so-called hoomin "experts." The optimal age for neutering a male ferret
>is fourteen.  Yes, fourteen.
 
-- I can confirm this.  What I'm about to print is not pretty.  The
following was published by me on the FML some years ago depicting the
graphic details of what can result by choosing not to neuter your male.
I've laid out some pointers to make the most of the situation with
whole hobs.
 
HOW TO BRING YOUR MALE INTO A RAGING RUT:
 
- Sachet in front of male as much as possible.
 
- Try to show as much of your backside and tail as frequently as
possible.  Tail swishing is especially effective.  The male will begin
to look your way at this point, it may take five minutes or it may take
five days ... depending on the male.
 
- Expose oneself in front of male at every opportunity.  You may find
said male beginning to follow you more.  He may be at your heels like
your shadow and/or he may just be unusually communicative and vocal.
Vocalizations may vary from understandable language to nonsensical
chatter and noises.  If he demonstrates any of this behavior, act
coyly.  Later, you may respond with smiles and with more of the previous
mentioned tactics.
 
- Brush up, touch, paw at, push, hug, and tackle male often.  You may
at this point in time notice your mates grooming behaviors have varied.
His hair may take on an oily or greasy appearance so as to look all
"slickered up " and handsome for you.  He thinks his hair is softer and
more attractive this way.  You may notice him beginning to smell a bit
differently.  He is doing this for you also.  Just remember, as awful as
he might appear or as awful as he might smell ... in his eyes, it's is
all for [you in his eyes.]  [BIG]
 
- Kiss and lick male here and there in very brief intervals, but
frequently.  Said male will begin to act impulsively.  He may do
something aggressive and abrupt such as grabbing onto your tail, or
clinging on to you.
 
- Just act is if he is not there when he tries to do such things and
wiggle out of his grasp.  The male may begin regularly marking his
territory (your home).  Ignore him.
 
- At this time, it's fun to give the male false hopes, but saying
"maybe".  By this point in time his eyes may have rings beginning to
form around them from lack of sleep because he can only think of one
thing now... you.  He will be acting full of himself at this point.
Parading around and such.  Demonstrating his various "abilities and
talents" just to get your attention.  He may show you previews of what
is to come on that special and anticipated night by acting "it" out on
everything nearest to him.  Although much of this behavior is repulsive
to you, remember that he is doing this to impress you.  Do not be
impressed.
 
- Nay, do not be impressed!  No matter how extreme his behavior becomes
nor attempts he puts forth, tell him... "I am not impressed yet".  He
will grease his hair and spruce up more and more.  He will make himself
smell prettier and prettier by putting on musky "cologne".  And he will
proceed to grab you more and more as you walk by, and even at times
aggressively kiss your neck.
 
- Do not be impressed.  Tell him, over and over, no it's not time ... you
are not ready yet.  Look at the specimen before you, size him up, and the
just say coyly, "no.." At this point, the male will be almost ready.  He
will demonstrate this by war dancing all about for you in very impressive
ways.  But do not be impressed.  He is still not ready.  Said male will
vocalize to you in such a way to tell you he is past ready, and that he
may die if you are not impressed yet.  But I repeat, do not be impressed.
 
- At this point, you may want to vocalize back to the male.  It's fun
to parade about showing off your pretty self and your delectable body.
Do so often.  But when he makes his advances, stop the vocalization and
parading on a dime.  Leave him in standing.  Said male will, at this
point in time, begin to act very macho.  He may assert himself by marking
anything and every thing as HIS territory.  He wants so very much to
impress you so he does not die as he believes.  Lifting his tail and
poofing around the home will become a regular thing.  In desperation,
he may poof everywhere he goes with you.  If you are really lucky, you
may witness a sliming!
 
- By this time I would give him some "encouragement".  Be very creative.
We don't want him to get discouraged or quit, do we?  No, we want him to
be the most he can be, and it takes so very much to impress a female.
He will react to this "encouragement" with very aggressive overtures...
first by mightily dancing about, and vocalizing very, very loudly and
assertively, then by even grabbing and clinging onto you.  If you are
lucky... you may even get scruffed.  When he gets this physical, take
note of his testicles, if they aren't three times as large as their
normal size... he must wait longer, because this is not impressive to
you.
 
- Now comes the test, ask the male for every unreasonable thing in the
world that he has said no to before.  You will get at least one out of
two things requested.  In the remote chance that he does not relinquish
great bounties, at least by this point, you WILL be the most impressed
female on the block!  Either way you win.  You will be very happy with
the results, I promise you.
 
Wolfy
 
<http://wolfysluv.jacksnet.com>
[Posted in FML issue 5086]