Dear Ferret Folks-
 
My body is still experiencing little mirthquakes, aftershockes of
amusement from Susan's post.  The DHS lady and the policeman demanding to
be let in to rescue those poor oppressed children from their cages!  Oh,
Susan, wretched, wretched, abusive parent!  Did you tell them that you
pour oil on your children's bellies to distract them when you clip their
toenails, too?  Oh, I would have.  Betcha.  And how you give them plastic
bags as toys?  The ones that say in tiny letters on the side SUFFOCATION
HAZARD: NOT A TOY?
 
Eavesdroppers beware the ferret parent! "Yeah, one of my kids pooped in
the corner behind the speakers so I scruffed him and put him back in his
cage for a time out."
 
Heeere comes a rescue party!  Chaaaarge!
 
Maybe one of Susan's kids dialed the phone with his nose and called the
DHS himself to complain.  "And she keeps me in a CAGE with three other
kids and only gives us dry chow to eat, no fresh rabbit, ever!" And there
is a Social Worker on the other end of the hotline writing this all down
thinking "Fresh rabbit?" And the little squeaky voice from the Budweiser
commercials continues on, "Yeah, yeah!  And sometimes we get raisins as
a treat but only ONE RAISIN at a time.  It's never enough, We're hungry!
We're starving!"
 
Oh, Susan.  You didn't torture them NEARLY enough!
Alexandra in MA
[Posted in FML issue 4981]