Dear Ferret Folks-
 
My husband said to me tonight (24 hours into owning our first ever male
ferret, Ping) "Do you have ANY IDEA what you've gotten us into for the
next seven years?  All because you wanted a MALE ferret?" Hmm.  Lemme
see.  Would that be something like: CRASH!  Bang!  Boom!  How the hell
did he get up there?  The shelf!  The shelf!  He's on the shelf!  Watch
out, he can JUMP IT!  AAAGHH!!!  He's climbing!  Stupid, he can't
squeeze UNDER the door, but he can CLAW IT OPEN!!  NOOOOOO!!!
NOOOOOOOO!!  That's MIIIINE!!!!  How did he DO that?  None of the
OTHERS ever did that!!  He can't POSSIBLY jump....that....SMASH BAM
TINKLE-TINKLE-TINKLE.... The dog!!  He's going after the dog's tail!
Get him before he goes under the....sofa.  (*hit!) MY GOD!!  HE PEED,
AND WIPED HIS *ICK OFF ON MY SOCK!!  I SWEAR, REALLY!!  The one on my
FOOT, why do you THINK I'm so upset!!  I don't BELIEVE this animal!  He's
not a ferret, he's a PIGMY WOLVERINE!!
 
Yeah, I think the next seven years are going to be something like that.
I guess tomorrow we go down to Toys 'R Us and get bicycle helmets and
whiffle ball bats so that we can play with him without getting hurt too
badly.  Fortunately, we get Blue Cross Blue Shield through my husband's
work.
 
I figure we can rent a big dumpster, and just throw everything we own
that is breakable right into it through our kitchen window.  It will
save Ping all kinds of time in the long run.
 
Lily is not speaking to us.
 
(We love him.)
Alexandra in MA
[Posted in FML issue 4845]