I have been a ferret parent for about 6 months now and a subscriber to
the list for a bit longer than that.  As a first time ferret-friend, I
have really benefited from the expertise and experience reflected in the
postings and archives - thanks a lot!  I found myself on my on after a
14 year marriage and decided that a pair of ferrets would brighten my
life and provide a pleasant focus for my 5 year old daughters energies -
I was right on both accounts!  However, as we all know, they are
destructive little buggers and while I have learned to tolerate the
frequent deep-knee bends required to clean up the "presents" my two guys,
Itchy and Scratchy, leave around the house it drives me nuts when they
obsessively destroy my furniture!  In particular they have attacked the
underside of my new couch with a vengeance.  They tear holes in the
fabric, then climb into the couch and proceed to tear apart the foam
stuffing.  This is not only bad for my couch, but potentially dangerous
to the ferrets if they swallow the foam.  I repaired the fabric twice
and they tore it again.  I bought vinyl floor tile and stapled it around
the edges and corners where they were making the tears and they moved
into the middle and tore a hole there!  I also tried everything else I
could think of - Bitter Apple, time outs, etc.  - but I would watch
their twitching ferret faces gaze mournfully through the cage bars at
the couch waiting for the chance to leap out and attack again.  It became
a personal crusade for me - not only to protect couch and ferret, but to
prove that I - a HUMAN BEING - could outsmart two OCD (obsessive
compulsive destructive) fuzzbutts named after fictional cartoon
characters featured in another cartoon!
 
As a contribution to the greater knowledge base of the ferret-list
community, I share with you my solution - Plastic storm window covering!
This product is sold at many ACE hardware stored (and other places I am
sure, but not Home Depot!) and is sold by the foot off of a 2.5 foot wide
roll (I paid $1.39/foot).  It is a very smooth, very thick (10 mills), a
good width for most furniture and clear (with UV protection, but you
don't generally need that under a couch!).  I got a $25 electric staple
gun at Sears and a shop razor to trim around the edges and had the stuff
installed in 15 minutes!  Now they sit under the couch and look forlornly
at the hole they can see but not access and I can be pleased that I
outsmarted two ferrets.  My daughter and I did the Ferret Dance of Joy
for many minutes!  The war may not be over -- but this battle I won!  I
hope this helps others who love both their ferrets and their furniture!
 
Best, ASG
[Posted in FML issue 4798]