I think most of my pet deaths were fairly sudden.  Some even tragic.
Very few deaths were long term like Ping's.  Ping's situation was rough
in that the process was exhausting.  Yet, with Ping it was already
accepted that he was going/gone and that was a major difference from what
I was used to.  Pong ... I hate to say, I bounced back quickly even
though I fell so hard.  It was hard to accept, yet I got to enjoy him
until the last days.  There are pro's and con's of both.  But when it's
an especially close pet or family member, is it harder one way or the
other?  Sometimes things are what they seem.
 
This is not a like situation, but it demonstrates how things are not
always obvious.  A study was done about ten years ago where family's of
autistic and emotionally disturbed children were studied along side of
chronically and fatally ill children (yes fatally).  They looked to see
what psychiatric e ffects were prevalent.  Well, of course if you have a
child on deaths door, that would be worse, right?  Yes, it's worse, but
not harder mentally/psychiatrically.  Let me explain.  They found that
people with the chronically ill children had to deal with chronic and
sometimes severe depression.  But parents of children who were autistic
or emotionally disturbed had a high incidence of hospitalizations due to
acute nervous breakdowns and even more severe events/conditions.  Too
true.  I did not meet a single parent of a dying child in the hospital.
But I did meet parents of autistic children who's conditions were either
triggered by their child's condition or brought on by situations
surrounding their child.
 
So perhaps there are two completely different reactions to the very
different types of deaths we experience with ferrets?
 
I'm trying to cover up the fact (with all this talk), that I am
extremely sad and stressed over the situation with Rocky.  I'm not
loosing my mind ... I'm not in the least bit worried that this might
trigger an event with me (I am severely bipolar).  But wow, the chronic
dark cloud that looms above is just unbearable.  The fact that he may
be gone tomorrow or ten months from now is very upsetting.  His death is
a very slow process.  Pong was sudden and tragic, and my world crashed
down around me.  But I didn't have the long term effects at all.
 
I know the logical and healthy thing to do would be to forget all of this
and enjoy him every day that I can.  He is not dying ... he is "living".
But or feelings are what they are, and cannot be dictated by what is
rational.
 
You all are the best.  Thank you for all the support.  Thank you for your
interest.  Thank you for being a shoulder.  I'm very glad that I did make
the decision to come forward now.  I am saving all of the sweet notes for
myself, and more importantly for Sean.  When it's needed, down the line,
he will have them for comfort.
 
Everytime Sean receives a nice note or present, he asks, "Mom, did you
tell them the story??" "Yes, Sean," I always reply.  And I'm met with a
beaming smile before he dashes off to share it with Rocky.
 
Wolfy
http://wolfysluv.jacksnet.com
[Posted in FML issue 4877]