Your chumpie little dogs, and your chimpanzees....your rats and bats, and
elephants as sure as your born, but I ain't gonna get no unicorn....!!!!
Uh, no, I mean ferret!!!  Ok - did everyone sing along with that?
Hehehe.  Ok - the words might have been a little off - but hey this is
MY story now right?  Hehehe.  Ok - funny story time for all!!!  I want
to say first though - thanks to everyone who offers their daily advice,
stories, and experiences.  You never know who you touch with your
stories - and I know that I have learned so much from each and everyone
of you!!!
 
I remember when I got my first ferret.............I have to share the
truth with all of you.  I am an accidental ferret Momma.  Yep.  Total
accident.  My son was going thru a rough time in his life.  I had
divorced, moved to California, took a new job, moved with again to New
Mexico, for yet another career change and got re-married.  All within 4
years worth of time.  Now that is enough to drive a full grown adult over
the edge, not to mention what it did to a 7 year old.  Well, Zach found a
buddy in San Diego - who raised fancy rats.  Yes, I said RATS.  Somehow -
these kids talked me into getting one too.  I went to Petco - under the
full intention of buyin a HAMSTER.  They have tails.  With fur on them.
And are not depicted in any horror stories (that I am aware of).  Little
did I know that the forces of nature were about to rear their ugly heads
and prove once again, what a SAP and pushover I am.  Off to Petco we go -
Zach and I.  The employee there helping us asked Zach what he wanted -
and Zach said RAT.  Mom said:EWWWW!!!  No, gimme one of those cute little
fuzzie hamsters ya'll have on sale and we will call it good!!!  Rats are
filthy vermin and I won't even consider one!!!  I said this.....to.....
a......woman..........who.....raises prize fancy rats.  *Sigh* I was done
for.  She grabbed me by my ear and dragged me into the back room where
she proceeded to beat the snot out of me.  Ok - not really - she showed
me, a new Momma rat - with all her babies.  She spent 45 minutes
describing the lives, love and kindness of rats.  Yes, you guessed it.  I
got suckered into one.  Beautiful little girl.  Now if only she didn't
have that disgusting pink tail I thought.......why am I prattling on
about rats you are wondering?  Well - I will tell you.  This little rat
turned out to be one of the nicest "rodent' pets I had ever had.  She was
sweet, kind, never bit - loved shoulder rides, etc.  When we relocated to
New Mexico with her the dang truck driver fell in love with her and had
her ridin in the cab up front with him.  Best little pet we had.  Until
that ill-fated December day when we had a house fire.  Now all our
animals lived thru the fire (thank you God).  We just had to move out
for a little while - while our house was repaired.  My company put us in
corporate housing - but they wouldn't allow us to have our pets there.
So our little sweetness went to stay w/neighbors.  They had a son, same
age as mine - and he had just lost his rats (small world eh?).  They
were 3 years oold - so the family thought they died of old age.  Un
fortunately - that isn't what killed them.  We received a phone call from
our panicked neighbor - 4 days later.  Our Roxy had died, and noone knew
why.  Well - it seemed funny to me - first their rats, then ours.  So I
asked her if they had ever checked for gas leaks - etc.  Come to find
out - they had a carbon minoxide leak - that could have killed them.
So - our rat died, saving someone else.
 
Neat story but again, you are wondering "where is she going with this"?
When Roxy died - I thought "man - Zach won't be able to take this....He
would have been devastated by this loss, on top of everything else.  So
off to Petco I go again , in search of a new rat.  This is where I met
Helena for the first time.  I dropped my keys next to the ferret cage
(no, not on purpose).  I bent over to pick them up and felt someone pull
my hair.  I whipped up and around with my fists up - ready to battle who
ever it was that had me "by the short hairs" (ok it hurt!!!)- and to my
amazement there sat this little.....grinning.......furry......thing with
fangs!!!!  It took 3 employees to "dis-entangle" this little fuzzbutt -
and by that time, since she had about half of my hair in her grubby
little paw, I said: "I came her looking for a fancy rat....what is this?"
Needless to say - she came home with me.  I had never seen/held/heard of
ferrets before.  I put this little itty-bitty pint sized baseballsized
ball of fur on top of my piano (we were still "movin back in") -so the
piano was in the kitchen......and I swear to God this is what got me.....
she.....BOUNCED......straight up and down, over and over.....to the edge
of the piano.....and *BOING* , right off the edge she went!!!  Now I
freaked, thinking - oh God she must have hurt herself - I ran over to
where she landed.......and she.....bounced over to me - and bit my
foot......and kept right on bouncing.....and bouncing.(ok - so now I
realize it is her war-dance, but hell I didn't know what a FERRET was
then - how was I supposed to know what a war dance was?)zz
 
Well folks - that was it.........I was done in.  It took my husband and 3
of my sons to pick me up off the floor.  I was in hysterics.  I couldn't
stop laughing but all the while in the back of my head I was wondering :
"What the hell did I get?"  Is this normal?  I hoped not.  Normal does
NOT work in my house.  Bouncing......yeah, that works!!!  She was a
little "me"!!  I was hooked.  It has been ferret-central from that day
forward, one week later we got Romulus (he was her cage mate from Petco
and I couldn't leave him there...)....I never did get that rat........
but for some reason, no-one seems to notice.......*grins*
 
Kim and Her Army of Bouncing Idiots!!
[Posted in FML issue 4631]