The Delightfully Wacky Kris Kriskius Said:
 
>"Sunday May 1
>10:15 - 11:15 Bob Church"
>
>Is this fur real?  Bob Church is ONLY going to talk for an hour?  *grin*
 
And then the Wonderfully Demented Bill said:
 
>[Moderator's note: I heard Bob is going to be very strict in preventing
>speakers from going beyond their time limits.  But when Bob is the one
>talking maybe we'll have to use other means!  BIG]
 
Now Bill, no one was supposed to know about the trap door at the
speaker's podium.  One second past allotted time and those suckers are
goin' drop down into the basement!  It will all be on a pre-pay web-cam.
Of course, all profits go to ferret shelters.
 
Actually, all I am planning to do is rub a really stinky hob all over my
shirt, and slowly inch towards the speakers so I am standing right next
to them when their time is up.  Better yet, I'll just toss my used socks
at 'em.  And I have puns.  Lots of puns.
 
And Kris, I am proud to say I spoke last weekend in Indianapolis, and I
didn't go over my time.  Some might suggest the rotten produce frequently
tossed in my direction might have sped up my discourse, but no sir!  I
was right on time, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it!
 
Oh, yeah.  If you are ever near Indianapolis, check out the zoo.  They
have a couple of the largest Kodiaks I've ever seen, they have walrus
(very unusual) and in June, you can go into an underwater Plexiglas
thingie to view dolphins swimmin' about.  If you live near there and
want to join a ferret club, the Circle City ferret club is very nice,
and they have some long-term plans that are quite impressive.  I have
probably Bobbed-up their club name, so if you can't find it, email me
and I'll forward it so they can contact you.
 
Bob C  [log in to unmask]
 
"She had a mane like a horse, horns like a deer, face like a bear, eyes
like a polecat; while her body had something of each.  And that was
Welwa.
Andrew Lang 1901 The Violet Fairy Book.
[Posted in FML issue 4807]