It's with a heavy heart that I have to write that Petey was helped to
the bridge today.  The past couple of days were tough on Pete.  He lost
the use of his hind legs and it was apparent to me this morning that he
was in a lot of pain.  He wouldn't eat or drink.  He had that look that
I've heard so many of you refer to when it is just time to let go.  This
morning it was time.  The light in his beautiful dark eyes was fading
fast, and he was panting.
 
Pete was only 4 years old.  He was a complete impulse buy when he was
only a few weeks old.  I had gone into a Petco in Shrewsbury, MA to buy
food for my guys when I saw the most beautiful dark-eyed white kit ever
wrestling with one of his cagemates.  I had to have him.  I was on my
lunch break and the store wouldn't hold him for me.  He came home and
quickly became part of the crew.  He was a biter though.  Through time
and lots of kisses he became a sweetheart.  He still would bite from time
to time and he wasn't too fond of certain boyfriends, but he was still my
angel boy.  The vacuum cleaner scared him tremendously.  When I first
found out he had lymphoma about six weeks ago, I made sure to not run the
vacuum around him.  My carpet is a mess right now.  It's full of ferret
kibble crumbs, but I don't care.  The ride to the vet this morning was so
hard.  He was suffering so much that I have to admit that I couldn't wait
for him to be out of that pain despite the feeling I had to just take him
and start running.  Where the hell would I run to anyways?
 
The vet took him out back and came back up front to where I was bawling
to tell me it was done.  He was so great.  He told me I had done the
right thing and it really was time.  I don't doubt this in the least.
Two ladies that were waiting for their dogs came over to comfort me.
Then I went back to see Pete.  It just looked like he was sleeping.  Our
vet said he didn't fight it.  I kissed his limp little body good-bye for
the last time.  Then I remembered as he sat in my lap for the last time
this morning while reading the FML how he weakly reached up to kiss my
nose.  I guess we said good-bye in our own ways.  I sang to him.  It kept
him calm when he was feeling crappy.  He loved lullabys and also the
first song on Sade's Lover's Rock album.  I don't remember the name of it.
 
Interestingly enough I have been dreaming a lot about CJ, my first ferret
who passed from adrenal complications in May.  I'd like to think that he
was coming back to take Pete with him.  In time this pain will fade and
the tears will run dry.  My little sweetheart -gone at 4 years old.
 
Sadly, just us girls now,
Jennifer, Cindy, & Monsoon
Missing Pete & CJ
 
"Hush little baby, don't say a word.  Momma's gonna buy you a
mockingbird..."
[Posted in FML issue 4287]