In light of recent events, I thought it was time for would-be ferret
residents in California to have an official anthem.
 
Here then, sung to the hymn "Onward Christian Soldiers" is what I hope
will become the marching song for all California ferret lovers.
 
 
Hurry, ferrets, board the plane,
We're due in L.A!
With a big white banner,
Here's what it will say:
"All you folks at Fish and Game,
What's it gonna take?
You know we're domesticated,
Give us guys a break!"
 
     Chorus:
 
     March on bravely ferrets; resolved that
     For our freedom, we'll strive!
     We will hold a rally
     On Rodeo Drive.
 
We can't fish and we can't hunt,
What on earth's a cow?
We can't tell a Jersey
From an old snow plow.
Boys are neutered, girls are spayed,
We can't reproduce.
We won't overrun your landscape,
That's a lame excuse!
 
        (Chorus)
 
We just want to live in peace
With our fellow man.
Won't you reconsider?
Lift that ferret ban!
All we'll bring are love and joy.
How can that be bad?
Keeping us outside your borders,
Makes your people sad!
 
        (Chorus)
 
Mary Cohen
[Posted in FML issue 4299]