Q: "Can I have my ferret's ear pierced?"
 
A: Only after they pierce yours.
 
I've seen a few cats sporting earrings, but never a ferret.  I wouldn't
recommend it because of the amount of wrestling done by ferrets during
normal play.  I would suspect something as attractive as an earring
would be torn out of the ear in a very short time.
 
Q: "If my ferret plays outside, can they get worms?"
 
A: Sure; depending on the area, they could even get night crawlers.
 
Ferrets can theoretically become infected with an extremely small
bone-eroding "worm" that frequently infects the nose and sinuses of North
American mustelids, especially spotted skunk and mink.  With perhaps a
few exceptions, they can also pick up any parasite that will infest your
dog or cat.  They can also become infected with heartworm.  I highly
recommend heartworm treatment be administered by your vet if you live in
a risk region.  I also recommend periodic inspection of your ferret's
feces if you allow them to have extended outdoor play sessions.  If you
suspect your ferret has worms, save some feces in a ziplock, and take it
and your ferret to the vet.  Be careful the "worms" or "eggs" you are
seeing are not undigested rice from the play box.
 
Q: "How many ferrets are too many?"
 
A: It depends on how many socks you own.
 
I always say, 1/2 of what you can realistically afford, 2/3rds of what
you have time to individually play with each day, and a 1/4th of what you
think you have the space for.  Ferrets ALWAYS cost more in medical bills
than planned for, ALWAYS take up more play time to properly bond to you
than you think, and ALWAYS need at least four times the space than you
allow.  The truth is, I think ANY group, including mine, should never
exceed the size of a typical litter, between 3 and 12.  I think more
than that in unfair to the owner AND the ferrets.
 
Q: "What is the strangest cage you have ever seen?"
 
A: The ones that hold the go-go girls.  How do you unlock them?
 
I've seen a lot of bad ones.  The most interesting one I've seen was a
converted walk-in closet.  The carpet was replaced with ceramic tile, the
sliding doors replaced with locking sliding screens (the bottom rail was
reinforced), and the closet had multiple levels, ramps, tubes, nesting
boxes, and a table-height feeding area.  There was probably as much floor
space as in a small room, if you added up all the levels.  The strangest
one was a converted refrigerator, where the owner cut holes in the door
and screened them in.  The owner's home, located in a desert area, lacked
air conditioning (they used a swamp cooler), and the owner claimed the
cage, running on the warmest setting with the "opened" door, maintained
a 70-75 F temperature on the warmest days.  Cool, eh?
 
Bob C
[Posted in FML issue 4138]