FERRET-SEARCH@LISTSERV.FERRETMAILINGLIST.ORG
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Fri, 14 Feb 2003 15:56:14 -0600 |
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> 1. Ferrets were domesticated
F) in a subversive attempt to corner the home manure market.
> 2. Domestication is
E) a process where polecats convince humans to grind whole chickens into
a savory snack.
> 3. Domestication has caused the following changes in ferrets (compared
> to their wild progenitors):
I) the ability to find the most tender part of the human body to lick,
lick, and chomp.
> 4. Ferrets were domesticated
H) by arrogant Americans about AD 1977.
> 5. The progenitor of the domesticated ferret was
E) Disney cartoon weasels.
> 6. Ferrets never became popular as a domesticated animal because
E) of a conspiracy of deception promoted by jealous dogs and cats.
> 7. Ferrets were commonly found in the United States
E) whenever socks could be found in sufficient quantity.
> 8. Ferrets were used during the 1800s in the United States
I) to spur the textile industry via the manufacturing of replacement
socks.
> 9. Ferrets
E) think the entire California Fishin' Gestapo has the collective IQ of
a salamander.
> 10. In the last 200+ years, the number of feral colonies of ferrets
> found in the United States, Canada and Mexico number
F) more than you can count, given ferret math.
> 11. Compared to the polecat progenitor, domestication has changed the
> digestive system of ferrets
E) by instilling the ability to produce vastly more fecal bulk than food
consumed.
> 12. The scientific name for the domesticated ferret is
E) back-of-the-knee nipping demon spawn from hell.
> 13. An animal isn't domesticated unless
E) it is represented by at least one cute Disney character.
> 14. Generalized public disapproval of ferrets can be traced to
G) the high concentration of joy per body weight, making ferret
ownership too intense for some wimpy people.
> 15. The suspicion that ferrets suffer genetic disorders caused by
> inbreeding is probably attributable to
F) a ferret conspiracy to grow large enough to easily consume cats.
> 16. Ferrets were domesticated in
F) Sacramento, California.
> 17. Animals are domesticated in areas were you find
E) raisins, kibble and corners.
> 18. Juvenilization is an artifact of domestication where
E) ferrets become juvenile delinquents and loiter around corners.
> 19. The difficulty of tracing ferret domestication can be at least
> partially attributed to
E) efforts to hide the background of ferrets by the Weasel Protection
Agency.
> 20. Domestication
E) is a myth; it's all evolution, Baby!
[Posted in FML issue 4059]
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