Condolences to those with lost, missing, or angeled candle reshapers...
 
(Hey!  Hershey!  Candles aren't supposed to *bend* like that!)
 
Ferret Education:
 
Look, this won't work.  First off, ferrets won't sit still at their
desks.  They are constantly playing with their pencils.  They chew on
the erasers.  The put the tail of the ferret sitting in front of them,
into their inkwells.  The eat their lunch without closing their mouth
when they chew.  And worst of all, when the teacher isn't looking they
steal the chalk!  Just save everyone the hassle and don't try putting
your ferret into public education.
 
Additional Daffynitions:
 
What do you call:
 
-a ferret with a new set of Tazzy Wheels?
 
Speed Racer!  (or scooter, or happy-as-a-clam, or Racer X, or
zoomZOOMzoom, or "Goin' Mobile", etc.)
 
-a cat in a house full of ferret?
 
Jealous
 
-an unsuspecting ferret waddling through the room?
 
A Legitimate Target!!!
 
-a human sitting on the couch, who is suddenly run over by three ferrets
 playing tag?
 
Civilian casualty
 
-special "presents" left behind the door?
 
Unspecified by-products
 
-a ferret exploring a dusty coffee table?
 
A self-propelled dust rag
 
OK, who will bribe me to stop these?  Let's start the bidding at $100!
 
Todd and the (does he know how to raise money, or what?) Fuzzbutt Rodeo
Clowns!
 
---
mailto:[log in to unmask]
http://www.netconex.com/toddl/page2/
 
[Moderator's note: Well, if you're going to get into the battlefield
terms:
 
- The mess remaining after a room-full of ferrets' playtime:
 
Collateral damage                                  BIG]
[Posted in FML issue 3970]